有关外国跑团的人们的搞笑橋段。(Players say the funniest things)

[daydayday]

由于某个人给了我连结，所以我看到了很多好笑的东西，来和大家分享一下吧。

细结的部分我就不翻的太详细，只要看懂笑点在那里就好了。

对了，先说一下，这里可能会牵扯到一些现在没有翻译，并且很有可能在以后也不会有人完整翻译的长篇模组(东方快车、奈亚的面具、犹格之影)的爆雷，所以请小心观看。


“这个地方挤满了不死生物。只有两种方法离开这里。这种（举起一把枪）和这种（举起另一把枪）。"

劇透 -   :

"The place is swarming with the undead. There's only two ways out of here. This (holds up a gun) and this (holds up another gun)."

在这个时候，我是一个面具(指奈亚的面具，一个知名的长篇模组)的KP，我的前英国陆军玩家和他剑桥大学橄榄球队的朋友（大型猎人和探险家PC ）在邪教会期间闯入了JuJu房子的地下室， 悄悄的拉开帷幕并发现了要被教徒当成祭品的私家侦探PC（又名地雷探测器：他原本走进JUJU家问"我发誓你不会碰巧知道这里有什么邪教，是吧？”）。 战斗发挥如下：

陆军：我把要把这个装满汽油的罐子扔向那团邪教突围着跳舞的营火中[投出：02 爆击]

猎人：我要用枪射爆它（投出：01 - 用大象枪射击！）

探险家：我要用射击用刀对着那个私家侦探的教士[投出：02 - .303步枪]

一切在引爆声和尖叫中停了下来。 PC放下了步枪并拿出左轮手枪。 到了下一轮，目前大多数幸存的邪教徒都在着火。

军官：我走进房间，用手枪开了一发，并大喊：“不准动！我们是英国人！”

KP：“我的天啊.......”

不幸的是，从那里开始我们必须从山上下来了，在拯救PL后我们坐上了逃跑的汽车（幸运的是，由我们经验丰富的调查员对这台车做了必要的修改，并拆除了所有的后照镜，使司机不能看到什么东西在追逐我们-防止任何不幸的SAN损失事件)这时幸存的邪教徒已经重整旗鼓，并在我们后面召唤出了恐怖猎手，在可耻的撤退到布鲁克林大桥时。由于极度想狩猎恐惧猎手，于是手持猎象枪的猎人把后车窗摇了下来并大喊"你这该死的家伙开慢点!我要把那家伙的头挂在我的墙上！"

这就是那些日子。

格雷姆

劇透 -   :

There was this time when I was a player in Masks where my Ex-British Army Officer PC and his heavily armed Cambridge University rugby team friends (the big game hunter and explorer PCs) snuck into the basement of the JuJu house during a cult meeting and (stealthily) pulled aside the curtain revealing the cultists celebrating the capture of the private eye PC (aka the mine detector: He originally got captured by walking into the JuJu house and asking - I swear - "You wouldn't happen to know of any cults around here, would you?"). The combat played out as follows:

Army officer: I throw the jerry can of petrol into the fire with the cultists dancing around it [roll dice: 02 - impale the throw check]

Big game hunter: I let the priest have it - both barrels [roll dice: 01 - impales... with an elephant gun!]

Explorer: I shoot the cultist with the knife next to the private eye [roll dice: 02 - impales with a .303 rifle]

Brief pause for detonation and screaming. PCs drop rifles and draw service revolvers. Next round. By now most of the surviving cultists are on fire.

Army officer: I step into the room, pistol drawn and yell "Nobody Move! We're British!"

Keeper: "Oh dear God..."

Unfortunately things went a little down hill from there on out. After rescuing the PI, we escaped and got into the getaway car (luckily, being experienced investigators we had made the necessary modifications and removed all the rear view mirrors so the driver couldn't see what was chasing us - preventing any unfortunate San loss incidents). At this point, the surviving cultists had regrouped and sent a Hunting Horror after us. The party beat an ignominious retreat across the Brooklyn Bridge with the Hunting Horror in pursuit and the elephant gun weilding game hunter leaning out the back window shouting "Slow Down, damn you! I'm going to have that bugger's head for my wall!"

Those were the days!

Graeme

还有在面具，PC在澳大利亚。 自然的他们不再相信任何东西了（我为自己的娱乐添加了一个船上的游戏，这包含了更多的SAN盛宴）。 但无论如何，他们遇到了Wycroft，作为一个KP，基于某些理由我将他描述成了某种在我的描述方式里最令人毛骨悚然的人(说话的很缓慢，小心的描述他的行为并让他一直盯着PC们看)然后

亚当（英国军队的人）：对。 我要射击他的头部两次。砰！ 砰!

我：什么？有证人之类的，他什么也没做。

亚当：是的，没错。他显然是一个异教徒，我不会和邦德一样蠢的(原文是走上他的道路)（另一个PC，在肯亚被杀）。

四轮后，Wycroft、Adam和三个古利人都死了，奇怪的是在Wycroft被攻击时其他PC都会出来帮忙他，包括亚当，他只是不相信自已会在没有好的理由下对别人开枪。

劇透 -   :

Also in Masks (a pattern?) The PCs are in Australia. Naturaly they no longer trust anything (i added a ship board encounter for my own amusement and to feast on a little more SAN). But anyway they meet Wycroft and as a keeper i for some reason played him off as the most creepy person i could (talking slowly, carefuly describing him etc. all the things that PC's watch for.) Then:

Adam (the Brittish army man): Right. I shoot him in the head twice Bang! Bang!

Me: WHAT? There are witnesses and such, and he's done nothing.

Adam: Yeah right. he's obviously a cultist and i'm not going the way of Bond (another PC, killed in Kenya).

four rounds later Wycroft, Adam and the three Kooris were dead oddly all of them save Wycroft were shot by the other PCs, including Adam, he just wasn't to be trusted if he'd shoot a man for no good reason.

我的某团玩家们想出了一个独特的解决方案，某个地下洞穴/寺庙里复杂挤满了警卫和僵尸。玩家把死掉的玩家复活后变成了僵尸；然后在他们的身上绑满了数磅的TNT与硝基毒物然后再附加了探测器。接着他们将他们的亡灵朋友送到邪教组织的复杂洞穴里进行“自杀”任务，密封入口并引起整个结构的崩塌，令人不安，独特而有效。有趣的是，当埃及古文物人员质疑时，他们的反应是：


“我们当然知道我们在干什么！看在上帝的份上，我们为大英博物馆工作"

似乎英国是一个在做进行非常幸运或鲁莽的行为时的合理解释。

劇透 -   :

One party I know of came up with a unique solution to an underground cave/temple complex swarming with guards and zombies. The party resurrected some of their deceased party members as zombies; strapped pound after pound of TNT and Nitro to their bodies and tethered them to a det cord attached to a plunger. They then sent their undead companions into the cultist's cave complex on a "suicide" mission, sealing the entrances and causing a collapse of the whole complex. Disturbing, unique and effective. And interestingly enough, when questioned by the Egyptian Antiquities Personnel, their response was:

"Of course we know what we are doing! For God's sake man, we work for the British Museum "

Seems being British is a rational explanation for extremely lucky or rash behavior.

在“面具”中，在肯尼亚的章节中，玩家们不久将要去黑风山，他们刚刚设法通过与陆军接触获得了大量的武器，所以我想让他们进行一场大型的狩猎比赛来进行心理治疗，让他们玩他们的新玩具，因为武器对奈亚来说无疑是无用的。 以下是他们的大型狩猎考察的片段：

KP：吉普车缓缓地穿过萨凡纳。确实很安静。你来到长草的边缘，在一棵孤零零的枯树下，有三只沉睡的雄狮。
PL：我拿出手榴弹

还有一次在狩猎时他们因为被一个非常愤怒的犀牛追逐而致撞坏了他们的吉普车，而他们都从车上跑了下来，而犀牛正卡在车上，某个PL忽然想出了十分天才的想法，用射击燃料箱导致的爆炸来杀死犀牛。事实上，它将犀牛推向了50英尺高的空中。 其中两名PC的闪避失败，接着熊熊燃烧的犀牛尸体就掉到了他们的身上了。

劇透 -   :

In Masks, in the Kenyan chapter, it was very shortly before the players were going to go to The Mountain of The Black Winds and they had just managed to aquire a huge amount of weapons through an army contact so I thought that I'd let them go on a big game hunt as a treat to let them play with their new toys as they would be pretty useless against Nyarlathotep anyway. The following is a wee excerpt from their big game hunting expedition:

Keeper: The jeep rolls slowly through the savannah. It's very quiet indeed. You come to the edge of the long grass and there, at the foot of a lone dead tree, are three sleeping male lions.
Player: I get the grenades.

Also at one point on the hunt they managed to crash their jeep while being chased by a very angry Rhino. They all managed to get clear of the jeep which the rhino then proceeded to heatbut apart. One of the players got the genius idea that shooting the fuel tank would therefore cause an explosion killing the rhino. In fact it launched the rhino 50ft up into the air. Two of the players failed their dodge rolls and had a burning rhino carcass land on them.

几个月前，我是第一次当CoC的KP，我的团队也是第一次参加。 我正使用D20规则来跑闹鬼。 对话是这样的：

我：“戴夫 - 关于你的清单上的这个项目。”
戴夫：“坚实的银制假dio?"
我：“是的，你确定要在假dio上消耗点数吗？”
戴夫：“谁会不愿意？”
我：“你买不起纯银的假dio。”
戴夫：“镀银怎么样？”

- 以后 -

戴夫：“我把假dio戳进颅骨的眼窝里。”
我：没有什么事情发生。
戴夫：“我把假dio戳在头骨的另一只眼窝里。”
我：没有什么事情发生。
戴夫：“我在颅骨的嘴里戳进假dio。”
我：“除了KP失去了几点SAN值外，什么也没有发生。”
戴夫：“我至少兴奋起来了对吗？"
基思：“如果戴夫兴奋起来了，那我就射杀他。”

- 以后还是 -

我“突然间，有个拜亚基俯冲了下来，抓住戴夫的假屌并飞走了，在任何人做出反应前，它完全在地平线上消失，永远不会再见了。"
戴夫：“它拿走了我的假dio？"
我：“是的。"
戴夫：“你知道我把它放在我的裤子里的。"
我：“是的。"
戴夫：“你说，拜亚基脱掉了我的裤子？
我："呃....是啊?"
戴夫：“我享受吗？"

劇透 -   :

A couple of months ago I was a first-time CoC keeper, and my group were first time players. I was running the haunted theatre scenario from the D20 sourcebook. Conversation went something like this:

Me: "Dave -- about this item on your inventory list."
Dave: "The solid silver dildo?"
Me: "...yeah. Are you sure you want to spend inventory points on a DILDO?"
Dave: "Who wouldn't?"
Me: "...you can't afford a silver dildo."
Dave: "How about a silver plated one?"

-- Later --

Dave: "I shove the dildo in the skull's eye socket."
Me: "Nothing happens."
Dave: "I shove the dildo in the skull's other eye socket."
Me: "Nothing happens."
Dave: "I shove the dildo in the skull's mouth."
Me: "Aside from the keeper losing a couple of SAN points, nothing happens."
Dave: "Am I getting excited, at least?"
Keith: "If Dave's getting excited, I shoot him."

-- Later still --

Me "Suddenly a byakhee swoops down, grabs Dave's dildo and flies off with it before anyone can react. It vanishes completely over the horizon and is NEVER SEEN AGAIN."
Dave: "It got my dildo?"
Me: "Yes."
Dave: "I had that in my pants, you know."
Me: "Yes."
Dave: "Are you saying the byakhee reached down my pants?"
Me: "Uh... yes."
Dave: "Did I like it?"

哦，多年的游戏真会的让一些美好的时刻成真。 这是我最喜欢的交流之一：

PC：我将正在阅读的「格拉基启示录」翻至最后一页。

(投骰子的声音)

KP：请在你的人物卡顶端上写上大大的"Y”。(格拉基启示录第十二卷)

劇透 -   :

Oh the years of playing really yeilded some wonderful moments. Here's one of my favorite exchanges:

Player: I'm just going to read the last page of The Revelations of Glaaki.

The sound of dice being dropped

Keeper: Put a big "Y" on the top of your character sheet.

我的最爱的一个标题，“愚蠢的角色死亡”：

KP：你看到哈斯塔向你移动而来。
PL1：我跑
PL2：我跑
PL3：我跑
PL4：我射他

Del Rio

劇透 -   :

One of my all-time favorites - from a Usenet thread titled "Stupid character deaths":

Keeper: You see Hastur coming towards you.
Player 1: I run.
Player 2: I run.
Player 3: I run.
Player 4: I shoot him.

Del Rio

上次开团的某个PL，因为PL们住在一个非常漂亮的乡村别墅，而又恰好碰上了大量繁殖的老鼠：

“我说我们买炸药后炸了这个房子，然后从瓦砾堆里筛选线索！”

劇透 -   :

A good one from last session, as the players were staying at a very nice country house that just happened to be infested with rat things:

"I say we buy dynamite, blow up the entire house and then sift through the rubble for clues!"

嘿，
我在这个论坛是新人，直到发现了这个不可抗拒的贴。
自从80年代以来，我一直在玩CoT，真的可以与你在这里写的故事有关。
我记得这个清楚，即使是二十年前（他妈的），因为我们玩了它；在露营时开了《来自犹格斯的真菌》(模组)，我是一个真正的新手KP在当时就像我的PL一样。
好的，无论如何，由于某种原因，我不明白为什么， PC遇到了哈斯塔。
我把他描述给玩家（从规则书中大声朗读:-)，并期望他们了解他们面临的是什么样的存在。
我让大家进行SC，一或两个人避免了疯狂了。一名玩家失去了60-70的理智，变得紧张。 第四名PC也SAN值检定失败，并且要失去1d100的理智。
我投了骰子，出了一个01
PC（一名60岁的教授，总是带着镰刀，因为它造成了很大的伤害）。 说：
我坚定地站起来并检查祂...说...「那就是哈斯塔，确实很有趣...」
我回答，看看你的同伴。 他们要么疯了，要么正在为自己的生命而行动！
所以你下一步做要什么
PC：“我要试着踢他”，
所以他做了，再次投出01。
这是一个完美的踢击，他使用了如同艺术家般的武术技巧完美踢向哈斯塔。
然后在第二秒他变成一堆灰尘，散落在地上。

劇透 -   :

Hey all,
Im new to this forum and found this irresistable tread).
Ive been playing CoT since the mids 80ths and really could relate to the stories that you wrote here.
I remember this one clearly even if it was more than 20 years (sheesh) since we played it; The campain was the ol' fungi from yuggoth and I was the keeper; a real newbee at the time just like the players.
Ok, anyway, for some reason, i cant remember why, the PCs met Hastur.
I described him to the players (reading out loud from the rule book:-) and expected them to understand what kind of entity they faced.
I asked everyone for a sanity roll and 1 or 2 of them made it, and avoided going insane. 1 player lost like 60-70 sanity and became catatonic. The fourth player also failed his sanity roll and was about to loose 1d100 sanity.
I rolled the dice and they came up with a 01-
The player ( a 60 year old professor, always carrying a scythe, since it did plenty of damage). said:
I stand firm and examine him.,...saying...so thats hastur,,interesting indeed...
I replied with,,but look at your comerades. they are either insane or running for their lives!
What are you doing next?
Player: " I try to round kick him".,
So he did and rolled a 01 again.
It was a perfect roundkick, hitting hastur with the skill of a martial arts artist, with perfect graze.
the very next second he was dust on the ground.

Was a lol moment..)

目前，我们正在玩犹格·索托斯之影(某个大型模组集)，在继续前我要先提到，在下面的故事里有些剧透的成分。

我很高兴有些非常有经验的PC; 4名男子和2名女性，他们都有很大的幽默感，（当他们想要时）也很正派。 他们甚至在现实生活中都有一些非常正轻的职业; 一个是心理学家，一个考古学家，由于某些原因，其中4个是教师。由于他们都是聪明智慧的人，所以我每次玩耍时他们常常会愚蠢的让我感到惊讶）。

无论如何，我们正在跑到第三幕; 他们听到一个星形石头，存放在米斯卡塔尼克大学里，帮助他们保护自己免受邪恶。
所以，我的小组玩家决定进入大学去偷石头。
（由于某种原因，每次我们玩，他们总在做某些违法的事情）。

所以，半小时左右，他们就大力讨论如何进行突破。 在较早的一集中，玩家获得了2个运输（门）箱，用于双向运输人员。
他们的第一个计划是把大学里面的一个盒子装进去，把它伪装成一张桌子或者东西，所以他们可以在夜间大学里运送自己。
经过一番讨论，他们都同意这一点太难了，所以他们提出了一个新的计划，打劫守卫员，然后闯入，然后与石头一起逃跑。
经过一些思考，他们发现这个计划比第一个更冒险，...所以它继续了30分钟，而我正坐着静静地等待着，里面笑着等待他们记住一个某些事情，他们都忘记了....）

正如玩家即将放弃，并同意做一个打击和跑步，
PC中的老教授说： 好吧，我去上班了，我们后来继续进行集思广益。所以他在米斯卡塔尼克大学工作，当然他有钥匙，因为他是那里的管理人员之一。
不用说，在接下来的30分钟里，我们的PC笑了，他实际上（和其余的PC）在打算破坏他的工作场所。
那天晚上，他去那里，打开了前门，去拿起这颗星星（它被锁在一个抽屉里，他也有钥匙），没有任何流血或暴力。

无价）

劇透 -   :

At the moment, we are playing the Shadows of yog-sothoth campain, and before I continue, there are some spoilers in the following story.

I have the the pleasure to have a very experienced group of players; 4 men and 2 women, all of them with a great sense of humour, and (when they want to be) also very bright. They even have some very lovecraftian occupations in real life; one is a phychologist, 1 archaeologist and for some reason, 4 of them are schoolteachers.
Since all of them are pretty smart and witted people, it amazes me everytime we play, how incredibly stupid they can be).

Anyway, we are currently playing the third episode in SOY; the cannich chapther, and they heard about a star-shaped stone, stored in the miscatonic university, that would help them be protected from evil.
So, my little group of players decides to break into the university to steal the stone.
(for some reason, everytime we play, they are doing something illeagal).

So, for half an hour or so, they discussed intensly how they would perform the breakin. In an earlier episode, the players obtained the 2 transport (gate) boxes, useful to transport people in both directions.
Their first plan was to get one of the boxes inside the university and disguise it as a table or something, so they could transport themselves inside the university nighttime.
After some discussion they all agreed this would be too difficult, so they came up with a new plan, smacking the nightguard, and just break in, and then escape with the stone.
After some more thinking, they found this plan to be even more risky than the first one,...and so it went on for like 30 minutes, while i was sitting silently waiting, laughing inside...waited for them to remember a certain thing that they all forgotten about....)

Just as the players was about to give up, and agreed to do a hit and run,
The old proffessor in the party said; Ok, Im going to work, and we continue our brainstorming later...So he went to work, at Miscatonic university, to where of course he had the keys, since he was one of the admins there.
Well needless to say, we spent the next 30 minutes laughing our bums off, that he actually (and the rest of the players) was planning on breaking in at his workplace.
Later that evening, he went there, opened up the front door, and went to fetch the starstone (it was locked inside a monter, to wich he also had the keys), without any bloodshed or violence.

Priceless)

昨天晚上再一次玩鬼屋并带新手。

KP：滴来下的东西是从一摊在天花板上的血迹滴下来的。
玩家：有什么不寻常的吗？
KP：是的，它是一摊在天花板上的血迹。

KP：你听到这样的噪音*开始用手敲打桌子*
玩家：听起来像什么？
KP：听起来像这样*用手敲打桌子*

劇透 -   :

Played the Haunting again last night with some newbies.

GM: The dripping is coming from a puddle blood which has gathered on the ceiling.
Player: Is there anything unusual about it?
GM: Yes, its a puddle of blood which has gathered on the ceiling.

GM: You hear a noise like this *starts banging hand on table*
Player: What does it sound like?
GM: It sounds like this *bangs hand on table*

在我第一次与一帮朋友的跑团中，一名玩家被拘留了，因为他在一周前才发生纵火案且还没抓到犯人的某商店附近小巷搞潜行。

不用说，他在监狱里等着他的同伴来接他，因为那是一个没有手机的时代，警官问他们怎么知道他在那儿。而记者与所有人，都说那名玩家是那种经常出现在监狱或警察局的人。

 不用说，在此之后，警方变得更加怀疑他们了。

劇透 -   :

In my first run of the Haunting with a bunch of friends, a certain player managed to get himself arrested by lurking in an alleyway near a shop that had just experienced an as-of-yet unsolved arson case the week before.

So needless to say, he was waiting in jail when his fellow players came to pick him up and since it was an era of no cellphones, the sergeant asked them how they knew he was there.

And the journalist, of all people, says that the first player is the type who often appears in jail or a police station.

Needless to say, the police became a lot more suspicious of them after that.

现代游戏

许多CoC方案需要，最后，经过多少工作，知道了一个孩子要被牺牲（我不记得给哪个神了）。 我们设法通过花费我们的SAN来学习有关他们的事（阅读：“我的角色”）- 知道了他们必须要用什么刀来杀死了孩子...

重要信息...

所以我们找到了这个仪式的地方，看到远远的很多邪教徒在宝宝身边，所以我选择溜走，狙击一下。 大概80%的潜行和大约93%的步枪（军事人物），我可能可以阻止他们（今天我们会说不，怕“拉尼尔）。 我们抽了一支烟，在那期间我告诉KP我的目标。

我们回到游戏：

我：如果我错过了这一枪，他们来追我，所以拼命跑…如果我逃跑了，他们会追上我，所以跑得像地狱一样…

KP：投3个潜行来就位

我：23，44，41，我很棒啊

KP：好的，你设法找到了狙击点，现在投吧...

其他玩家：我们正通过双筒望远镜观看...

我：03，我觉得这是一个野蛮的... *KP在桌子上发出了一阵欢呼，但是其他人没有注意到KP脸上的表情*（我的投了.30-06斯普林菲尔德的伤害）总共19点的伤害...

KP：完全死亡....请正在观查的PC们做一个SAN检查，因为婴儿不再是...

在这时，其他的玩家传来阵阵杀意，我试图冷静地解释，我不知道我是否可以在一击中杀死邪教领袖，但是我知道我可以在一击中杀死宝宝

真的非常糟糕的一个部分是，他们全都在SAN检定里失败了，然后又在灵感检定里成功发狂了，同时吸引了邪教的注意力。

然后，我遵循我自己的想法，像一个婊子一样的跑了。

其他人死了，我活着，然后他们再也没有让我参加过了...............

(这个人的签名很有意思我也放上来)

我有一颗赤子之心。

我把它放在我的电脑旁边的一个罐子里

劇透 -   :

Modern day game

As many CoC scenarios require, we ended up, after much work, learning that a child was to be sacrificed (to which god, I don't recall). We'd managed to learn - through methods that cost us (read: 'my character') SAN - that the cerimoial knife had to be what killed the kid...

Important info...

So we find the place the ceremony will be, and see far, far to many cultists to take on and till save the baby, so I chose to sneak up, and snipe-off a shot. With a sneak of about 80, and a rifle of about 93 (Military character) it was likely I could pull it off (Today we would say no, in fear of "Pulling a Neil"). We take a smoke break, and during that time I inform the Keeper of my target.

We return to the table:

Me (to party): If I miss this shot, they are coming after me, so run like hell.... If I make the run, they are coming after me, so run like hell...

Keeper: Make 3 sneak rolls to get into position

Me: 23, 44, 41, I'm golden...

Keeper: Ok you manage to make it into position, make your roll...

The rest of the party: We watch through binoculars...

Me: Aught three... I think that's an impale... *Keeper agrees amongst much cheering at the table, yet the group doesn't notice the look on the Keepers face* (I roll damage on a scoped .30- 06 Springfield) 19 total...

Keeper: completely dead.. Those waching *pauses for the table to claim they are watching, which they do* need to make a SAN check as the BABY ceases to be...

At this point the table wants me dead... I calmly try to explain that I had no idea if I coud kill the cult leader in one hit, but I KNEW I could kill the baby in one hit...

The really, really bad part is that they ALL failed their SAN checks, made thei Idea roll, ended up getting an insanity, and either fell over in a pile, or charged the cultist in a fit of homicidal rage...

I, however, follow my own advice and run like a bitch, leaving the rifle for a cultist to handle and be conected with...

Party dies, I live, and they never let me take "the shot" ever again...

I have the heart of a child.

I keep it in a jar next to my computer...

是的，面具似乎是一个试金石。以下是我跑东方快车(果园里有翻译)时在伦敦的一段插曲。由于调查员们无法弄清楚乘客里的Fenalik是谁，所以他们最终决定杀死火车上的所有人（奇怪的是，火车不会停下来的警告似乎对他们有利.....）

劇透 -   :

Yes, Masks seems to be a gold mine. My quote below is taken from an episode in London. When I ran Horror on the Orient Express and the characters couldn't figure out which passenger Fenalik was, they finally decided to kill everybody on the train (oddly enough, the no-stopping the train caveat really worked to their advantage)...

常上论坛的人就会知道，我目前正在跑黑暗时代。 该跑到“盲人之眼”的部份。 调查员们提出了一些越来越疯狂的计划来扰乱费伦茨的仪式。

1.“这些疯子打算复兴凯尔特人吗？让我们试试他们在罗马入侵期间使用的东西。你偷了我一只猪，我就找来一批沥青，用沥青覆盖猪然后把它们给点后冲向邪教徒。”

2.“我们需要为这些吉普赛人煽动一些民族狂热，大家都知道吉普赛人会偷孩子，所以我会看看能否找到一个正在自已玩的村里的孩子，然后把他们带到斯温顿吃点冰淇淋，当我离开的时候，你去告诉他们的父母他被被吉普赛人带走了。“

一个个类似于此的计划被实行，费伦茨在晚上派遣杀手杀死他们（他们激怒了他），这让事情变得更简单。调查员很快的就够说服一个农村数量的暴民，费伦茨正在大篷车里正在试图抚养魔鬼。这最终导致了某个PL，站出来并高呼我们该如何“处理这些亵渎的移民”。

在公开场合。

如你所见，这次的战役是开始于大学里的角色扮演社团的，我们稍后忽然明白在一个综合大学的的工作区内玩角色扮演会有一些缺点...

劇透 -   :

As attentive forumites will know, I'm currently running Dark Designs. The group just finished 'Eyes for the Blind'. They came up with a number of increasingly insane plans to disrupt Ferencz's ritual.

1. "These nutters are into Celtic revivalism, eh? Let's try something they used during the Roman invasion. You lot steal me a pig,

I'll knock up a batch of pitch.

We cover the pig in pitch,

light it and then send it crashing through the cultists."

2. "We need to whip up some ethnic frenzy against these Gypsies. Well everyone 'knows' that Gypsies steal children... so I'll see if I can find one of the village children playing on their own then I'll [pause] take them to Swindon for some ice cream. While I'm away, you tell the parents they've been kindnapped by Gypsies."

A plan similar to this was followed, made simpler by Ferencz having sent Nightgaunts to kill them (they provoked him) that night. They were able to convince a lynch-mob sized group of villagers that Ferencz's caravan were trying to raise the devil. This culminated with one of the players on his feet, shouting about how they needed to "deal with those blasphemous immigrants".

In public.

You see, this campaign is being played with the university roleplay society. We later decided that it was sometimes a drawback, using the university workspace to roleplay in...

1573年的现代PL不小心在一个农民面前提到照像机。

农民：什么是相机？
枫丹：西班牙绘画的异端形式

劇透 -   :

Modern players in 1573 accidentally mention cameras in front of one of the peasants.

Peasant: What a camera?
Fontaine: It a heretical form of Spanish Painting...

调查员从Eihort的迷宫中找到出路，出现在地下的寺庙里。

他们可以听到坚实的门后传来的诵经声。 宗教仪式正在准备在寺庙举行仪式。 没有其他办法在邪教组织不注意的情况下逃脱，除非他们打算回到迷宫。

其中一名调查员搜查寺庙，并在Eihort的大块花岗岩雕像下的讲台上找到一本书。 微笑的玩家声称这本大书是宝藏。

其中一名邪教徒进入圣殿，发现了玩家们。 他呼吁求救。 玩家射杀他死了 更多的邪教徒来了

“亵渎...”邪教领袖煽动着。

“不，我们只是看！我们不是亵渎者！ 这样着的玩家他的角色渴望的拿着那本神圣的书。

“看，他偷了这本书！” 一个愤怒的邪教徒说。

玩家（给KP）：这本书看起来很重要吗？
KP：嗯，是的
玩家：好的，我有一个想法：“站着，不然书就会变成纸屑了！” 并将枪指向书，好像是人质。

严肃的说...这事件不只发生了两次，在不同的游戏中，不同的玩家都做出了类似的行为。

谁说闪电不会在同一个地方下降两次？

劇透 -   :

The investigators find their way out from Eihort´s labyrinth and emerge in a subterranean temple.

They can hear the sound of chanting behind a solid door. The cultists are preparing for a ritual in the temple. There is no other way out but across the cult assembly or return to the labyrinth.

One of the investigators searches the temple and finds a book over a pulpit under a massive granite statue of Eihort. The player smiling claims the large book as a treasure.

One of the cultists enters the temple and finds the party. He cries for help. Players shoot him dead. More cultists come.

"Blasphemers..." hiss the cultist leader.

"No, we are JUST looking! We are not blasphemers!" says the player character with the large sacred book in his eager hands.

"Look! He’s stolen the book!" says one of the angry cultists.

Player (to the Keeper): This book looks important?
Keeper: Hmm, yes...
Player: Ok, I have an idea: "Back, or the book turn confetti!" and points the gun to the volume as if its a hostage.

Serious... this happen not one but two times in different games, with different players.

Who says a lightning can’t fall twice in the same place????

我知道我以前说过这些，但他们重复。

总是很受欢迎的Cthulhu玩家引用：

“我和考古学家一起开始跑团，但是在结团时他却变成了一个突击队员？”

接下来的话引自一些经验丰富的COC玩家，他们所扮演的考古学家没有经历过任何超自然或神话事件。他们发现埃及的瓷罐埋在西班牙的城堡，是一个异端乐队的圣殿骑士要塞废墟。知道自己的角色永远不会活得足够长来公布自己的了不起的发现的细节 克里斯•克莱帕克（Chris Klepac）呻吟道。

"这真是我的角色(PC)再开心不过，而我(PL)再悲伤不过的一刻了。"

最后，多年以来，我们一直在跟我们室友米甚倾诉和臭名昭著的布莱尔雷诺兹一起跑团是一种什么样的感受。这位疯狂的艺术家过去为我们做了这么多可怕的艺术，包括两个主要的绿色三角洲模组。 米甚被布莱尔当年初次跑团的表现深深吸引，于是决定让布莱尔來参加一场团，其他PL已经跑了三场团。 在一小时内，布莱尔发现了闹鬼的原因，把它拖到外面，用凉亭作为葬礼焚烧炉。 然后模组就解决了

米甚对这个人不负盛名的表现叹为观止。"你知道，即使在建立这么多角色后，他也不会失望，他在房子里不到一个小时，已经有东西在起火了。"

总裁TMCorp，丹麦异教出版社Scott Glancy

劇透 -   :

I know I've said these before, but they bear repeating.

Alltime favorite Call of Cthulhu player quote:

"How come I started the game with an archeologist, but by the end of the game he's a commando?"

Next quote comes from when some very experienced Call of Cthulhu players were playing archeologists with no prior experience with the Mythos or the supernatural. They unearth Egyptian canopic jars buried in the ruins of a castle in spain that was a stronghold for a heretical band of Knights Templar. Knowing that their characters will never live long enough to publish the details of their 'remarkable find,' Chris Klepac moaned.

"This is one of those times when my character has never been more happy, and I've never been more sad."

Finally, for years we at Pagan had been telling our room-mate Mish about what it was like to role-play with the infamous Blair Reynolds, the mad artist who did so much horrific art for us in the past, including the covers of the two main Delta Green books. Intrigued by Blair's first game at Pagan Haus in a over year, Mish decided to watch as Blair joined a game that I the other players had been slogging through for three game sessions. Within a hour, Blair had discovered the cause of the haunting, dragged it outside and used the Gazebo as a funeral pyre to incinerate it. Scenario solved.

Mish was impressed that the man lived up to his over-hyped legend. "You know, even after all the build up, he doesn't disappoint. He's in the house less than an hour and already something's on fire."

A. Scott Glancy, President TCCorp, dba Pagan Publishing

东方快车的恐怖，位于意大利的情景。 玩家正在跟踪韦内扎中的一个拟像片段。

他们试图帮助一名在火车站被黑衬衫的暴徒骚扰的年轻艺术家。 其中一个PC是苏格兰场调查员，他闪烁他的徽章，向暴徒展示。

“我是英国公民和苏格兰场地代理人，这个人在我的保护之下，走开，解散！"

不用说，黑色衬衫不会离开。

在同一个活动中：

在君士坦丁堡的玩家，在土耳其的红色清真寺摊牌。 大量的狂热的无皮者邪教徒追着他们，其中一个PC向别人喊叫。

“战斗吧！ 他们只有五十个人！（该团有四个人活着，其中一些还是重伤员）"

不用说，那个PC的皮肤终于挂在了清真寺墙上。

劇透 -   :

Horror on the Orient Express campaign, scenario in FASCIST Italy. Players are tracking one of the Simulacrum fragments in Veneza.

They try to help a young artist harassed by Black Shirt thugs in a Train Station. One of the PC´s, a Scotland Yard investigator flashes his badge and shows to the mob.

"I’m a British citizen and a Scotland Yard agent, this man is under my protection. Go away and disband!"

Needless to say that the Black Shirts don’t go away and the agent had a hard time.

In the same campaign:

Players in Constantinople, showdown at the Red Mosque in Turkey. Plenty of Skinless One fanatic cultists chasing then and one of the Players shout to the others.

“Lets fight! They are only 50!” (The group have 4 pc´s alive and some badly wounded)

Needless to say again the skin of that PC ended hanging in one of the Mosque Wall.

有一个关于丹尼斯·德特勒勒（Dennis Detwiller）的故事，他的第一个角色（通过“阴影之王”）的运动得到了全面的解答（而其他人不得不更换角色多次因为少了三肢或四肢或只是普通的死亡）。 他们到达法属圭亚那的寺庙，炸毁邪教进入到梦境里的门。 被炸药震耳欲聋时，他们的邪教长袍（伪装）被炸毁，被一群愤怒的邪教组织所面对。 丹尼斯把通道指向被毁坏的大门，大声喊叫：“异教徒！不信者！他们向那里走了！

不幸的是，他用英语喊道。 我提到邪教在法国圭亚那吗？

我觉得他的最后一句话就像是“是的，祝你好运，再次和你的上帝再次说话，混蛋”。

总裁TMCorp，丹麦异教出版社Scott Glancy

劇透 -   :

There's a story about Dennis Detwiller getting all the way through The Realm of Shadows campaign on his first character (while everyone else had to replace their characters multiple times due to low san or missing limbs or just-plain-deadness). They get to the temple in French Guyana and dynamite the cult's gate to the Dreamlands. Deafened by the dynamite, their cultist robes (disguises) blown to tatters by the blast, the players are confronted by a horde of furious cultists. Dennis pointed down the passage to the destroyed gate and yells "Infidels! Unbelievers! They went that way!"

Unfortunately he yelled it in English. Did I mention the cult was in FRENCH Guyana?

I think his last words were something like "

Yeah, well, good luck ever talking to your god ever again, assholes."

A. Scott Glancy, President TCCorp, dba Pagan Publishing

两个PC ，一个是天主教牧师，另一个不存在于这个事件里，正在讨论关于《黑暗的边缘》里碰到的东西。

“那么，你驱魔了吗？"
牧师认真的说：“不，我开枪了。"

劇透 -   :

Two PCs, one a Catholic priest,

 the other not present for the event,

were discussing an encounter with a dead-man's-switch-summoned Dimensional Shamblers in the attic of an old house.

"So, you exorcised the demon?"
Priest, seriously: "No, I shot it."

KP：路上发生了一些事情。
PL一：我闭上眼睛
PL二：我也是
PL三：我也是
KP：车里的每个人都有眼睛闭上了吗？
所有玩家：是的
一分钟的沉默后
PL一：我不在乎

劇透 -   :

Keeper: There is something up ahead in the road.
Player one: I close my eyes
Player two: Me too.
Player three: Me too
Keeper: Everyone in the car has there eyes closed?
All players: yes
a minute of silence pass
Player one:...and I don't care

有一次玩面具我没有时间在跑团前准备，所以我不得不在玩的过程中快速剪掉手写本。 这个问题是，他们没有像印出的文件一样整齐地出来，而且该项目下的“Nyarlathotep Papers 9”文本仍然存在。

我的一个玩家有时在会议期间有些困倦，而在一次讨论中，PC试图将线索拼凑在一起，他说："我们真的应该尝试找出谁在出版这个Nyarlathotep纸，这个记号不断出现在任何地方。"

在一阵子的沉默后，大家笑了起来。

劇透 -   :

One time playing MASKs I didn´t have time to prepare before the session so I had to cut out the handoutcopies fast during play. The consequnce was that they didn´t come out as neat as ususal and that the "Nyarlathotep Papers 9" text under the item was still left.

One of my players sometimes gets a bit sleepy during sessions and during a disscussion where the PC:s try to piece the clues together he says, with sleapy voice;
- We really should try to find out who is publishing this Nyarlathotep Paper that keeps popping up everywhere.

One moments confused silence followed by an outburst of laughter.

勇敢的调查员正在搜索黑暗和沈没的地下墓穴，忽然听到一个奇怪的砰砰声。 主要的调查员将手电筒指向闪烁着一个黑暗的波纹广阔，似乎绕着.....

“这是扎特瓜的无形之子，大家快点射击！” 领先的调查员这么说道。

大规模的枪声回荡在地下墓穴里，在不停的射击后子弹也被打光了。

“我们干掉了吗？"

所有的调查员打开他们的手电筒照亮房间。 黑暗的，波澜壮阔的东西被看出是进过出口管道进来的的海水....

“我不敢相信我们刚刚把所有的子弹都射入了海里 !!!”

调查员都因为自已的过度反应笑了起来....

然后真正的无形之子出现了....

劇透 -   :

The brave investigators are searching the dark and dank catacombs, a strange slooshing sound can be heard ahead. The lead investigators flashlight flickers across a dark rippling expanse which seems to swirl about the .....

"It's a formless Spawn of Tsathoggua, everybody shoot it!!" cries the leading investigator.

Mass gunfire echoes through the catacombs, folowed by the click, click, click of empty weapons.

"Did we get it?"

All the investigators then turn on their torches to illuminate the chamber. The dark, rippling, slooshing thing is revealed to be the sea coming in through an outlet pipe....

"I can't believe we just fired All our bullets into the SEA!!!"

The investigators all laugh at their over-reaction....

Then the Real Spawn showed up....

我可以想到一个幽默的场景，玩家已经知道他们刚刚战斗的生物是可能感染性的逆转录病毒的结果，如果它进入你的血液就可以传播。 受伤的PC赤身裸体地将衣服扔出窗外，并向自已浇上酒精。 他开始大声喊叫其他玩家（这是在高速SUV追逐中），“获得裸体！”

他还枪杀了他们捕获的NPC科学家，并将他踢出超速SUV的后舱，造成车祸。 一个赤裸裸的男人在一个夜晚的芝加哥街上从超速SUV踢出尸体的场景会在我的脑海中久久不散。

劇透 -   :

I can think of a humorous Scenario where a player had learned that the creature they had just fought was the result of a possibly infectious retrovirus that could be spread if it got into your blood stream. Being wounded, the player stripped naked and threw his clothes out the window and covered himself in rubbing alcohol. He began shouting at the other players (this was during a highspeed SUV chase) to "Get Naked!"

He also shot the NPC scientist they had captured and kicked him out the back hatch of the speeding SUV...causing a car accident. The scene of a naked man kicking a corpse out of a speeding SUV in a night-time Chicago street is still with me.

不是CoC游戏，但是在我正在运行的AFMBE游戏中，玩家被困在僵尸闯入的公寓楼(其实这个是COC的模组-夜车)。在某层楼中有一位牧师和他的老妈妈 - 牧师正在帮助他们解读一本书中的邪恶法术，并找出一种方法来扭转这种谬误。 一旦他这样做，他会祝他们好运，并说他不能帮助他们，因为他的信仰不允许他使用这样的咒语。

然后PC为了让牧师帮助他们而开始继续殴打他。 大约10分钟后，开始变成Reservoir Dogs(霸道横行)这部电影的某个场景似的，幸运的是，老人的母亲从卧室出来，正好赶上用手杖从PC来加入这场混战。

想像一位80-90岁的老太太殴打一群20多岁的带着球棍和菜刀的年轻人真是非常有趣。

劇透 -   :

Not a CoC game, but in an AFMBE game I was running the players were stuck in an apartment building overrun by zombies. Across the hall was a priest and his elderly mother - the priest was helping them decipher the evil spell in a book and figure out a way to reverse it. Once he did, he wished them good luck and said he couldn't help them with the spell due to his beliefs.

The PCs then proceeded to beat the priest to get him to help them. This went on for about 10 minutes and started to transform into a scene from Reservoir Dogs. Fortunately, the elderly mother came out of the bedroom just in time to beat the crap out of the PCs with her cane.

It was pretty funny to imagine an 80-90 year old woman beating up a bunch of 20-somethings carrying bats and kitchen knives.

在“玩家做出最可怕的危险的事情”的引用中，这将是最适合的，但遗憾的是它还不存在。 也许会在一分钟内...

人质情况 - 所有玩家都要做的是谈判释放一名女性人质。 而已。 然而，正如我所期待的那样，我的玩家之一不是用快速的谈话或巧妙的方案，而是将他们的大象枪的两枪放在人质和俘虏身上。 在投完骰之后，随后进行了以下对话：

PL：我逮到他了吗
KP（我）：是的。 是的，你做到了。
非常高兴的PL： 人质的情况?
KP：是的，如果你能将分散的碎片捡回来的话，你甚至可以带她回到她的丈夫身边。
PL：哦

劇透 -   :

This would be most apt in the 'players do the most ridiculously dangerous things' thread, but sadly it doesn't exist yet. Maybe it will in a minute...

Hostage situation - all the players had to do was negotiate the release of one female hostage. That's it. However, instead of using fast talk or a clever scheme, as i was expecting, one of my players just unleashed both barrels of their elephant gun at the hostage and her captor. After all rolls had been made, the following dialogue ensued...

Player: I got him?
Keeper (Me): Yes. Yes you did.
Player, very happily:See? hostage situation over.
Keeper: yes... and if you can seperate the pieces, you can even take her back to her husband.
Player: ... oh.

玩家对他的召唤和控制byakhee：“我的宠物，去吃饲料吧。"

Byakhee从窗口飞出去，进入同一个房子的不同的房间，玩家和他们在不同房间的朋友。

其他玩家（从浴室休息进来）“我错过了什么吗？"

KP：不是，你附近的窗户爆炸，一个byakhee飞进去开始吃你。

玩家：Aiiii !!

召唤者：好宠物！

劇透 -   :

Player to his summoned and controlled byakhee: "Go forth my pet and feed!"

Byakhee flies out one window and into a different one of the same house the player - and his buddies who were in a different room were.

Other player (coming in from a bathroom break) "Did I miss anything?"

GM: Nope. Window near you explodes and a byakhee flies in to eat you.

Player: Aiiii!!

Summoner player: Good pet!

最短的调查员生涯。
我第一次运行跑面具，一个玩家刚刚失去了他的角色，所以他创造了一个新的。 2分钟后，他的第一件事就是戴上他们在JuJu House找到的面具。然后他看到Azathoth，他的理智检查失败了100个理智点。 他的角色生涯持续了2分钟。



以下两个引号已经成为我前任PC会议组合中的经典和内部笑话。 他们都来自同一个模组 鬼屋。

“来吧，这很容易赚钱”

之后，他们几乎跑出了柯比特家因为会移动的床和可怕的地窖，其中一位玩家发表了经典评论“我们就睡在客厅里吧”。

当天晚些时候，他们差点被吓死，然后被客厅里的漂浮匕首给杀了。

劇透 -   :

Shortest Investigator career.
I am running Masks for the first time, and a player has just lost his character so he makes a new one. The first thing he does after 2 minutes of playing is put on the mask, they found at the JuJu House. He sees Azathoth and fails his sanity check loosing 100 Sanity points. His career lasted 2 minutes in real time.



The following two quotes have become classic and inside jokes among my former group of Call players. They both come from the same scenario (The Haunting).

"Come on guys, It's easy money"

and after they almost ran out of the Corbit Mansion bacause of the moving bed and scary cellar one of the players utters the classic comment "We'll just sleep in the living room."

later the same night they are almost scared to death and killed in the living room by the floating dagger.

有一次，我正在玩一个名叫奥利弗的敏捷黑人暴徒。我是正在一栋大厦里被一些非常奇怪的教徒追逐，跑进/把自己锁到一个充满僧侣默默写作室。看到我唯一的逃跑路线是通过一个巨大的玻璃窗口，我抓住一个和尚并问他：“你相信上帝吗？" 不久之后他就飞出了窗户掉在外头，全身上下多了不少深深的切割痕迹。

还有一次我和我的一个朋友玩《黑暗之刃》。他不小心打腿红杰克和我离开的时候他寻求援助，他击败将流浪汉打昏。然后在不成功地试图刺杀流浪汉后（他要证明我的朋友杀了人）潜入他的病房和将漂白水注射漂进他的眼睛，我的朋友决心确保任务完成了。他进了医院， 从后面射了几次流浪汉，然后将身体扔出窗外，确保将枪放在流浪汉的手中。 当警方讯问他时，他就像这样：

警察:“你说这卧床不起的流浪汉偷偷跑出去，偷了你的枪，悄悄地溜回来，用枪在自已背后开了几枪然后从窗口跳出来吗？听起来就像是你杀了他一样。"

我的朋友“你的证据在哪里，警官？嗯，你的证据在哪里？"

劇透 -   :

One time I was playing a nimble black street thug named Oliver. I was on the run in a large mansion from some very odd cultist-guards, and ran into/locked myself into a room full of monks silently writing. Seeing my only escape was by crashing through a giant stainglass window, I grabbed one of the monks by the habit and asked him, "Do you believe in God?" He crashed through the window, receiving many deep cuts, shortly thereafter.

Another time I played "The Edge of Darkness" with a friend of mine. He accidentally shot the leg off of Red Jake and when I left him to seek aid, he beat the hobo unconscious. After unsuccessfully attempting to assassinate the Hobo (who was going to testify my friend had murdered someone) by sneaking into his hospital room and injecting bleach into his eye, my friend resolved to make sure the job got done. He broke into the hospital, shot the hobo in the back several times and threw his body out of the window, making sure to place his gun in the hobo's hand. When the police interrogated him it went something like this:

Officer "So, you're saying that this bedridden hobo snuck out, stole your gun, snuck back, shot himself in the back several times and lept out the window? Sounds like you murdered him."

My Friend "Where's your proof, officer? Huh? Where's your proof?"

好的，先生。

有没有机会听到沃克在废物中臭名昭著的“查理·卓别林”故事？

显然，当异教徒出版艺术家/文学家布莱尔·雷诺兹（Blair Reynolds）在费尔班克斯阿拉斯加州的朋友们的废物中跑步沃克时，玩家们确信查理·卓别林是伊塔库亚的邪教徒。

要重新计算导致这一结论的不合理链条是件过于痛苦的事。

这个极不可思议的猜测的最终结果是，卓别林在楠塔基特岛的游泳池派对遭到袭击，他的房子起火，许多客人被枪杀。

当负责屠杀的两名PL回到游戏内时，自豪地宣布他们杀了一大堆邪教，查理·卓别林是其中之一，其他的PL一脸惊恐的看着他们。 其他玩家最终说服了天才兄弟，卓别林不是一个邪教徒，他们犯了一个巨大的错误。 但是当其他玩家试图解释整个世界将如何狩猎他们时，两只天才只是耸了耸肩，说：

“有什么大不了的，他只是一个演员，对吧？"

当我遇到一名来自费尔班克斯阿拉斯加的GenCon的人，今年我问他是否知道布莱尔或他以前和他一起玩的PL。 由于在费尔班克斯只有一家游戏店，我并不惊讶地发现他确实知道他们，尽管他们没有与他们交往。 当他知道他们时，他们在大学，他在中学。 但是，当我问他是否知道查理·卓别林的故事时，他笑着说：“哦，是的，费尔班克斯的所有玩家知道这个故事。”

这只是展示两个白痴在停止思考和开始拍摄时可以完成的事情。

劇透 -   :

Well said, sir.

Any chance you guys have heard the infamous "Charlie Chaplin" story from Walker in the Wastes?

Apparently while Pagan Publishing artist/cultist Blair Reynolds was running Walker in the Wastes for his friends up in Fairbanks Alaska, the players became convinced (through no fault of the Keeper) that Charlie Chapline (THE Charlie Chaplin) was a cultist of Ithaqua.

The chain of irrationality that led to this conclusion is almost too painful to recount.

The end result of this wildly improbable speculation was that Chaplin's pool party on Nantucket Island was attacked, his house set on fire and many of his guests were shot.

When the two players responsible for the massacre returned to the party and proudly announced that they had spanked a bunch of cultists and that Charlie Chaplin was one of them, the other players were horrified. The other players eventually convinced the genius brothers that Chaplin was not a cultists and they had made a collossal mistake. But when the other players tried to explain just how the entire world would be hunting them down, the two geniuses just shrugged their shoulders and said-

"What's the big deal? He's just an actor, right?"

When I ran into a guy from Fairbanks Alaska at GenCon this year I asked him if he knew Blair or the guys he used to game with. Since there was only ONE game store in Fairbanks I was not too surprised to find out he did know them, although never gamed with them. When he knew them they were in college and he was in middle school. But, when I asked him if he knew the Charlie Chaplin story he smiled and said "Oh, yeah. EVERY gamer in Fairbanks knows that story."

Nice. Just goes to show what two idiots can accomplish when they stop thinking and start shooting.

 好吧，我的愚蠢自己从面具。我责怪自己的第一部分，但是，他们使用的柔道后，它是那么好，我允许它。

在JuJu的房子里，其中一个角色说出了N-word(这里指的应该是黑鬼nigger)在黑人的住宅区。

“百万枪从你身边的阴影中走出来。”

玩家让对他快速谈话，摆脱困境。

那天晚上，他们决定打破僵局。一个玩家得到了用鞋油覆盖他的脸，脖子和手的想法，以帮助躲藏。 其他玩家喜欢这个想法，于是一起去吧。

最终，他们破坏了仪式，从被赶出的地方盖上长袍的教徒。同样的PL从提早就对黑暗大喊"帮助！3K党跟在我们后面！"

另一个成功的快速通话，百万枪回来，来帮助他们。

劇透 -   :

Ok, my own bit of silliness from Masks. I blame myself for the first part, however, the bit of judo they used afterwards on it was so nice, I allowed it.

While staking out the JuJu House, one of the characters utters the N-word in Harlem.

"A million guns come out of the shadows at you."

Player makes his Fast Talk and gets out of the situation.

Later that night, they decide to break in. One players gets the idea of covering his face, neck, and hands with shoe polish to aid in hiding. The other players like the idea and go along.

Eventually, they disrupt the ritual and are being chased out of the place by robed cultists with hoods on. The same player

 from earlier shouts to the darkness "Help! The KKK's after us!"

Another successful Fast Talk, and the million guns return and come to their aid.

图书馆长说，他将把它们添加到他们的特殊收藏，并要求调查员的名字，以便他们能够妥善地办理遗产归属“

“我不明白为什么你还想把它叫做遗产，而我还活着呢?”

“我们发现，最近当有人将这种性质的书本捐给我们的图书馆后通常在不久之后它就会变成遗产，所以我们干脆提前做以节省文书工作。

劇透 -   :

Ah. This thread has a lapsed old CoC player piping his eye in reminiscence. A few classics from over the years.

Playing Masks back in the late 80's, one of the characters (Charles Fortiscue? Memory fails) always wore a Cricket box and carried his bat with him everywhere.

He got quite good with that bat. Ever seen a Ghoul dispatched with a single perfectly timed cover-drive to the groin?

He came to sticky end though. Tipped over the edge by a little too much bedtime reading he was discovered in his cabin clad only in the aforementioned gentleman's Cricketing acoutrament and then attacked the rest of the party ina psychopathic frenzy. You can't subdue someone with a Colt .45 can you? Poor Charles.

From our old Keeper as someone's character's sanity hit zero "Pass me the sheet if you will. He's mine now..."

During another campaign, same group of players (whcih one is it when you end up in the Galapagos) we witnessed a spectacular series of successful rolls which resulted in a small detatchment of (NPC) Chilean Navy Marines scoring an impale, on a Shoggoth, with a 5 lb field gun. Unfortunately the shock annihalated their minds.

Another one from the same Keeper as our characters (all from "The Ward Phillips Institute for Paranornal Investigations[1]") decided to "pass the ticking bomb" to the Miskatonic U Library in the form of a pile of Mythos books that seemed to be attracting quite a few beasties to our vicinity:

The chief librarian says that he will add them to their Special Collections and asks for your name so that they can properly attribute the bequest"

"I don't understand why you want to call it a bequest while I'm still alive"

"We find that when someone passes tomes of this nature into our care calling it a bequest from the beginning saves on paperwork soon thereafter."

1) Character attrition was so high in this particular set of adventures that "The Institue" was created as an instrument of continuity. Also as somewhere we could display all of our Graduation Certificates from the local "Home For The Terminally Barking"

哦，我在一个运动中的性格是“科学之王”。 （基本上是Scully的角色。）前2或3次冒险，布鲁斯布罗斯基博士设法忽略所有有关超自然的东西。 （虽然，通过一系列幸运，他设法让他的隐藏和潜行高到足以让我们开始把他称为“黑暗精神科医生骑士(原文The Dark Knight Psychiatrist)”。）

所以，在我们挫败了邪教的仪式之后，他们正在使用的葡萄园被地震吞没，我的回答是“你知道的，这很加利福尼亚”。

在另一场比赛中，我仍然没有设法相信神话，所以当我们遇到一个在干燥的黑暗的小树林里有几具被吸干了血的尸体，树林中周围还有被破坏的遗迹时，我想出了我的理论“这一定是一直以来没有被生物学给分类的北美吸血种大象！”

由于我们很快就要开始跑面具，所以我创造了我的第二个角色，罗伯特·里普利（Robert L. Ripley）的采购代理人，他遇到布罗斯基博士时，试图出售他关于“布罗兹基大象”的发现。

劇透 -   :

Oh, my character in one campaign is the "man of science." (Basically the Scully character in the group.) The first 2 or 3 adventures, Dr. Bruce Brodsky manages to totally miss all the supernatural stuff. (Though, through a series of lucky rolls, he manages to get his Hide and Sneak up high enough that we begin referring to him as The Dark Knight Psychiatrist.")

So, after we've foiled the cult's ritual and the vineyard they're using is swallowed by an earthquake, my response is "Well, this IS California, you know."

In another game, I still haven't managed to become convinced of the Mythos, so when we come across the remains of someone sucked dry by a Dark Young in the midst of the woods and the wrecked woods around him, I come up with my theory of "

Some manner of heretofore unclassified North-American, bloodsucking species of elephant!"

Since we were going to start the Masks campaign soon, I created my second character, a purchasing agent for Robert L. Ripley, who met Dr. Brodsky when he tried to sell his findings about "Brodsky's Elephant."

昨晚我的PL是某个16岁的痞子，被迫参加这个读书俱乐部为他的“康复/社区服务"的一部分，当他的角色必须一边以时速90英里开着野马敞篷一边因为没有衣服穿而不得不去医院绑架一个病人时"“这太疯狂了！我以为这是一个读书俱乐部！”在那之后，我们不得不停了大约5分钟。

杰特

劇透 -   :

Last night one of my players who is playing a 16 yr old Gangbanger type who was forced to go to a book club as part of his "rehab/community service" in my modern campaign got the one liner award when his character said riding down the road in a mustang convertible at 90+ mph putting back on his clothes from streaking in a hospital as a distraction while kidnapping a patient , "This is crazy! I thought this was a book club!" We had to stop for about 5 minutes after that one.

Jath

一个罗马尼亚人（虽然有着俄罗斯口音），找到一个重要的线索，他的英文35％和图书馆使用25％：

“JINKOVITCH！”

劇透 -   :

A Romanian character (though played with a Russian accent), upon finding an important clue with his English 35% and Library Use 25%:

"JINKOVITCH!"

这在几年前发生在玩面具时

我：当你进入房间，你看到你的联系人躺在地板上，一个长长的血淋淋的胸口。 身体旁边，你看到似乎是一把异国刀，有一个弯曲的刀片

女调查员：他被枪杀了吗？

劇透 -   :

This happened a number of years ago while playing Masks

Me: As you enter the room, you see your contact lying on the floor, a long bloody gash in his chest. Next to the body, you see what appears to be an exotic knife with a curved blade

Female Investigator: Was he shot or stabbed ?

Runepriest

非常有趣的东西，谢谢分享。

在我的游戏中，我往往会有点严肃。 很多时候，当事情变得糟糕时，我的PC常常声称他们有额外的弹药或额外的武器，通常他们没有。 因此，如果它不是在他们的携带的设备表上的我通常会无视。

PC通常会从基本问题出发，

PC1; “我拿着一支手枪，3个弹夹，一个霰弹枪，再加上6发散弹。”

PC2; “我拿着我的手枪和100个弹夹。”

KP: “打扰一下？”

PC2; “是的，我正携带100个弹夹。”

KP “怎么带？”

PC2; “我把它们放在枕头套里。”

KP “你在哪里得到枕头套？”

PC2; “从酒店”。

KP “好，但是了解你的动作因为额外的重量而减少了。”

劇透 -   :

Very funny stuff thanks for sharing.

In my games I tend to be a bit anal. To many times I've had PCs claim to have extra shells or an extra weapon when things get hairy when usually they didn't. Thus if it's not on their carried equipment sheet or declaed than the PC is S.O.L.

I usually begin with the base question when PCs step out what are you carrying;

PC1; "I'm carrying a pistol, 3 mags, and a shotgun w/ 6 additional shells."

PC2; "I'm carrying my pistol and 100 mags."

GM; "Excuse me?"

PC2; "Yea, I'm carrying 100 mags."

GM; "How?"

PC2; "I'm carrying them in a pillow case."

GM; "Where did you get the pillow case?"

PC2; "From the hotel."

GM; "Fine but understand your moved is reduced because of the additional weight."

以下是对“闹鬼”结束的说法，其中一位调查员认为，如果他们只是用煤油冲洗柯比特他家并将其焚烧，那么最适合所有参与者。

（一名警务人员匆匆赶来调查烟雾，只看到一名男子站在人行道上观看）。

警官：这里发生了什么？

调查员：房子在失火。

警官：我的天啊！ 有人在里面吗

调查员：只有一个人。

警官：帮我一把，我们需要看看我们能救他吗？

调查员：他已经死了

警官：你的意思是你知道有一个男人被困在那个火焰里，你只是站在这里看着？

调查员：你误解了，我的官员。 他已经死了

警官：所以你知道那个房子里有尸体，没有报告？

调查员：不，不。 他进了房子之前他已经死了。

警官：调查员先生，我要请你跟我一起去警局发言。

调查员：证明。 听完整个故事后，这一切都会有意义的。

劇透 -   :

Very funny stuff thanks for sharing.

In my games I tend to be a bit anal. To many times I've had PCs claim to have extra shells or an extra weapon when things get hairy when usually they didn't. Thus if it's not on their carried equipment sheet or declaed than the PC is S.O.L.

I usually begin with the base question when PCs step out what are you carrying;

PC1; "I'm carrying a pistol, 3 mags, and a shotgun w/ 6 additional shells."

PC2; "I'm carrying my pistol and 100 mags."

GM; "Excuse me?"

PC2; "Yea, I'm carrying 100 mags."

GM; "How?"

PC2; "I'm carrying them in a pillow case."

GM; "Where did you get the pillow case?"

PC2; "From the hotel."

GM; "Fine but understand your moved is reduced because of the additional weight."

来自今天的游戏，闹鬼 ..

我（KP）：你听到窗外有一个划伤的噪音
玩家1：让我们一起，团队
玩家2：我走到窗前检查一下
玩家3：我靠近玩家2，还要检查窗口
玩家1：那我做同样的事情

他们都从窗户落下

调查员坠落后，玩家4走进房间，看到床在原来的地方

玩家4：我躺在床上，试着睡觉
我：你确定吗？
玩家4：是的

床然后把他扔出窗外

劇透 -   :

From todays game, The Haunting..

Me(keeper): You hear a scratching noise from the window
Player1: Let's stick together, team
Player2: I walk to the window and examine it
Player3: I stay close to player2 and also examine the window
P1: Well, I do the same thing

And they all fall down through the window

After investigators fall down, player 4 walks into the room and sees that the bed is in it's original place

Player4: I lie down on the bed and try to sleep
Me: Are you sure?
Player4: Yeah

The bed then throws him out through the window

从一次闹鬼：

我（KP）：你到达波士顿环球报，但是，这是凌晨2点，它是关闭的。 你应该再回来
玩家：嗯...也许我应该尝试打破。
我：（试图给他一个机会）你在建筑物的旁边看到一条黑暗的小巷，或许有一个更简单的方法...
玩家：恩，我拿出我的霰弹枪，开枪。

是的...他最后被警方抓获。

劇透 -   :

From a game of The Haunting:

Me (keeper): You arrive at the Boston Globe, however, it's 2 am and it's closed. You should come back later.
Player: Hmmm... maybe I should try to break in.
Me: (trying to give him a chance) You see a dark alleyway around the side of the building, maybe there's an easier way in...
Player: Nah, I take out my shotgun and shoot the window.

Yeah... he ended up getting shot and arrested by the police.

在GenCon玩了一个CoC游戏，还有一些很棒的人。 我们的小组无意中从教授的同事那里拿了一些文物，最后被温迪哥诅咒。 我们正在加拿大北部旅行，把雕像放回去，尝试设置一切正确。

我们到附近的乡村和教授（他们一直在阅读这些“Wendigos”的整个旅程，并在一分钟之后得到更多的努力）解释了我们的目的。 “我们一路走来学习废墟，我们希望在晚上有一些避难所，有一些工具和金钱来交换，我们不会打扰你的土地，不到一个星期就要离开， “他们都很赞成。

然后，某个操着完美的上层新英格兰口音的PC，他补充说。 “哦，我们也被温迪戈诅咒了"，好像在讨论天气一样。

当地人仍然让我们留下来，但是拒绝和我们说话，把还拿盐撒在我们的小屋的另一边。

冒险结束，我们发现古代的墓地需要返回雕像。 平台上有一个二十英尺宽，二十英尺深的沟渠，雕像被取走。 PC没有等待队员安排一些绳索穿过，他说的是第二个经典之作。

“我要跳”

是的，一个中年教授试图带着一个受诅咒的雕像时跳一个20英尺长的峡谷。 他沮丧地失败了，掉在坑里。 雕像破碎成一百万块，埋葬堆的顶部由降下了被唤醒的温迪哥。 整个小队都要SC，超过一半的队员疯狂。 拿着枪的人对他们周围的人们开火，那些没有跑过温迪哥的人或者跑的太慢的人都变成了尸体。

我的角色没有疯狂，但我仍然选择了自己的自由意志来射击那个跳跃失败的教授，在绝望的尝试中安抚愤怒的上帝。 它通过从我的骨头撕裂所有的肉来回应。

只有一位PC（超过13人死亡！）幸存下来，他几个星期后被发现在一个洞穴里，几乎被冻死，并在试图啃咬其他PC的胳膊。

我认为这是当我爱上这个游戏的时候 ：D

劇透 -   :

Played a CoC game at GenCon with some awesome people. Our group had inadvertently taken some artifacts from the professor's colleagues and ended up cursed by a Wendigo. We were travelling into northern Canada to put the idol back and try and set everything right.

We get to the nearby native village and the professor (who has been reading up on these 'Wendigos' the whole trip and getting nuttier by the minute) explains our purpose. "We've come all this way to study the ruins. We would like to have some shelter for the night, and have some tools and money to barter with. We'll not disturb your lands and be off in less than a week," to which they were all agreeable.

Then, in a perfect upper class New England accent, he added. "Oh, also we've all been cursed by a Wendigo," as if he were discussing the weather.

The natives still let us stay, but refused to speak with us and lined our cabin with a ring of salt.

The adventure ended by us finding the ancient burial ground the idol needed to be returned to. There was a twenty foot wide, twenty foot deep trench all around the platform the idol was taken from. Rather than wait for us to arrange some ropes to cross, he said the second classic line of the night.

"I'm going to jump"

Yes, a middle-aged professor tried to jump a 20' chasm while holding a cursed idol. He failed the roll miserably and landed in the pit. The idol shattered into a million pieces and the top of the burial mound was ripped off by the awakened Elder God Wendigo. The entire group had to roll sanity, and more than half the group wend insane. Those with guns opened fire on everyone around them, those without ran at the elder god or back down the hallway, now filled with zombies.

My character did not go insane, but I still chose of my own free will to shoot the jumping professor dead in a desperate attempt to appease the angered god. It responded by ripping all the flesh from my bones.

Only one PC (out of 13!) survived, he was found some weeks later in a cave, nearly frozen to death, and nibbling on the arm of one of the other PCs.

I think that's when I fell in love with this game

我最近跑了Crack'd＆Crook'd Manse。

退休拳击手（pc）：没错，我们希望你用这种岩盐的粉尘来喷洒。

撒药飞机飞行员：[吃惊]盐？ 不会杀死农作物吗？

退休拳击手：我们不希望你们捣碎庄稼，我们想把它传遍池塘。

撒药飞机飞行员：[goggle-eyed]一个池塘？

退休拳击手：是的，我们在池塘里遇到了非常严重的藻类问题。

撒药飞机飞行员：池塘在哪里？

退休拳击手：我来和你一起，我会告诉你在哪里。

撒药飞机飞行员：好的，你是客人。

后来在空中...

退休的拳击手：[喊着飞机的声音]这就是这个池塘。

撒药飞机飞行员：什么？

退休的拳击手：[现在大声]这是一个池塘，现在已经干了！

撒药飞机飞行员：[仔细看看“池塘”，失去了几点理智，同时灵感检定也失败了] AAAHHH !!!

当他们两个洒尘进入“池塘”之后飞走了

撒药飞机飞行员：有一个死尸在浮在上面吗？

退休拳击手：不，那是一个原木。

撒药飞机飞行员：但它看起来像...

退休拳击手：它是一个原木。

劇透 -   :

I recently ran Crack'd & Crook'd Manse.

Retired Boxer (pc): That's right, we want you to crop dust with this load of rock salt.

Cropduster: [startled] Salt? Won't that kill the crops?

Retired Boxer: We don't want you to dust crops, we want to spread this over a pond.

Cropduster: [goggle-eyed] A pond?

Retired Boxer: Yes, we are having a very serious algae problem with the pond.

Cropduster: Where is the pond?

Retired Boxer: I'm coming with you, I will show you where it is.

Cropduster: Okay, you're the customer.

Later, in the air...

Retired Boxer: [shouting over the sound of the plane] THAT'S IT, THAT'S THE POND.

Cropduster: WHAT?

Retired Boxer: [louder now] THAT'S THE POND, DUST IT NOW!

Cropduster: [gets closer look at "pond" and loses several points of sanity, but fails Idea roll] AAAHHH!!!

As they fly away after dusting the "pond" with two flyovers...

Cropduster: WAS THAT A DEAD BODY FLOATING IN THE POND?

Retired Boxer: NO, THAT WAS A LOG.

Cropduster: BUT IT LOOKED LIKE...

Retired Boxer: IT WAS DEFINITELY A LOG.

我最喜欢的一个是当我从“阴影”的书（冒险的名字逃脱了我的时刻），在20世纪20年代运行阿伯丁冒险。

这些玩家已经弄明白了苏格兰海岸的珊瑚礁的重要性，去了造船厂，聘请一艘船将他们带到那里 - 现在，这本叫做“幸运”卷的冒险书籍 - 遇见了友好的德国队长和他的船，把他们带到那里。 失败了，他们遇到了苏格兰渔民的邪教组织，他们将试图在海上谋杀他们。

就这样，我认为让他们做出选择会更有趣 - 只要我提到德国船只，我的一个PL，其性格是退休的英国陆军上校，马上以一个大声的声音宣布“该死的亨利！我在战争中得到了一个恶心的腿！"并继续肆意摧毁德国人和他的战争经历（纯粹是在性格上）。

由于他的努力，PL不得不加入苏格兰船员，最后一起在北海争取生活 ：眨眼： 我赞扬他的角色扮演，因为他的性格是不断变化的，让他们进入各种各样的画面。 ：大声笑：

劇透 -   :

One of my favorites was when I was running the Aberdeen adventure from the "In the Shadows" book (the name of the adventure escapes me for the moment), set in the 1920s.

The players, having figured out the significance of a reef off the coast of Scotland, went to the dockyard to hire a ship to take them there - now the adventure book called for a Luck roll - suceed, and they meet the friendly German Captain and his ship, who take them out there. Fail, and they meet the Scottish Fishermen cultists, who will attempt to murder them on the sea.

As it was, I figured it would be more fun to allow them to make the choice - as soon as I mentioned the German ship, one of my players whose character was a retired British Army Colonel, immediately announced in a loud voice "Damn the Huns! I got a gammy leg thanks to them in the War!" and proceeded to continue an expletive ridden damnation of the Germans and his war experiences (purely playing in character).

Thanks to his efforts, the players had to go with the Scottish ship, and so ended up in a fight for their lives on the North Sea :wink: I did applaud his roleplaying though, as his character was constantly cantankerous and getting them into various scrapes.

调查人员正在寻找两名罪犯，其中一人是一名相当无辜和无耻的年轻人，决定跟进一个指向附近妓院的领导。

妓女夫人：欢迎，先生。 进来放松吧 我相信我们只有适合你的女孩。 只要穿过左边的窗帘，告诉我你喜欢什么。

调查员：哦，呃...不，谢谢 你看，我正在找两个男人 -

妓院夫人：哦！ 我很抱歉先生！ 你会想要右边的窗帘。

劇透 -   :

The investigators were searching for two criminals and one of them, a rather innocent and unworldly young man, decided to follow up a lead that pointed to a nearby brothel.

Brothel Madame: Welcome, sir. Come in and relax. I'm sure that we've got just the right girl for you. Just go through the curtain on the left and tell me what you like.

Investigator: Oh... Uh... no thank you. You see, I'm looking for two men-

Brothel Madame: Oh! I am so sorry sir! You'll want the curtain on the right then.

调查人员为x现象进行工作，正在调查McKinley Bouelvard之家，这是一个精彩的预写场景。 有一次，他们确信这个怪物住在一间卧室里，但是尽管他们有相当的痛苦，但他们不想打开门。 所以相反，他们给生活在那里的一个人（海洛因使用者）大量的海洛因。

我：几个小时后，她现在睡在沙发上。
记者：现在好，睡着了吧？
我：是啊
摄影师：好的，我们把她搬到卧室的前方。
我：好的，投个Dex*5，以不要唤醒她。
摄影师：成功
记者：现在我们把烤肉酱倒在她身上。
摄影师：我在一张纸上写下“美人鱼”，把它放在她的顶上。
记者：陷阱被设置。 我们将设置一个伏击，并获取相机到位，以记录怪物。

它没有奏效。

劇透 -   :

The investigators work for phenomenon-x and are investigating The House on McKinley Bouelvard, a wonderful pre-written scenario. At one point, they are convinced that the monster is living in a bedroom but despite their considerable arsonal they don't want to open the door. So instead they give one of the people living there (a heroin user) lots of heroin.

Me: it's a few hours later and she's sleeping on the couch now.
Reporter: She's good and asleep now, right?
Me: Yeah...
Cameraman: Okay, we move her to infront of the bedroom.
Me: Okay make a Dex5 roll to not wake her up.
Cameraman: done.
Reporter: Now we pour barbercue sauce on her.
Cameraman: I write "yummy human" on a piece of paper and put that on top of her.
Reporter: The trap is set. We'll set up an ambush and get the cameras in place to record the monster.

It didn't work.

只是好奇 - 当她发现自已在一个新的地方全身覆盖着烧烤酱醒来时，她会说什么？ ：大声笑：

我不记得了，但是不久之后，摄影师就用霰弹枪射了她（几乎杀了她）。

另一个：玩家在一些遥远的地方，每当他们想要使用他们的手机，我都会让他们做运气。 其中一个人滚动了01，我正在使用POW加注的规则。

实习生：所以每一次运气都有机会让我的POW变得更好？
我：是的
实习生：我打电话给我的牢房
我：谁来？
实习生：谁在乎，让我们说妈妈。 这是幸运卷。
骰子滚动：00
我：手机爆了火焰。 你会受到一点伤害，并且烧焦了你的右耳。
实习生：什么鬼东西？
我：试图让你正确地了解大宇宙的意志。

劇透 -   :

I don't remember, but it wasn't long before the producer knocked her out (and almost killed her) with the butt of his shotgun.

Another one: The players are in some remoteish place and I was having them make luck rolls every time they wanted to use their cell phones. One of the guys rolled 01 and I was using the rules for POW imcrease.

The Intern: So every luck roll there's a chance that my POW gets better?
Me: Yes...
Intern: I make a call on my cell.
Me: Who to?
Intern: who cares, let's say my mother. Here's the luck roll.
Dice are rolled: 00
Me: The cell phone bursts into flames. You take one point of damage and singe your right ear.
Intern: What the hell?
Me: Serves you right for trying to game the universe.

我正在进行一次CoC游戏，玩家们在一个教区的地下室里发现了这个不断变化的门，越来越多的触手伸出来。 他们种了大量的炸药，并开始远距离接线。

第二个PC停下来问：

“好的，当有人问我们为什么要在街上展开这些电线时，我们要告诉他们什么？

答案是：

“我们会告诉他们，我是一个电信公司，正在安装新的电话线。”

劇透 -   :

I was keeping a CoC game where players discovered this evolving gate in a cultist's basement with more and more tentacles coming out of it. They planted a large dose of dynamite and began to wire it on long distance.

For a second one PC stopped and asked:

"Ok, what are we going to tell when someone will se us unrolling those wires in the street?!?"

Answer was:

"We will tell them we're just a telecomunication company guys and we're installing the new phone line."

在一个古考的"逃离印斯茅斯"游戏中，有一些人在印斯茅斯里的唯一技能就是某种型式的"闪光弹"，他们把它用在我们身上因为KP不觉得他们还有别的事可以做，但我看上去“天真无邪”，我曾经用这种方法来反驳他们愤怒的目光。

最后我们把圣经推销员的双腿打折了，让他留下来让白化的修格斯(KP的自设)分心而让我们成功逃脱。


 奇妙 ：大声笑： 优秀的横向思维。 他是PC还是NPC ？

 PC，你看，他是当时唯一没有武装的人，也是新的调查员，其余的 PC 已经是朋友了。

劇透 -   :

An old one, during the "Escape from Insmouth" game. There are some people in Insmouth who's only skill is some form of "Glare." They used it on us because the keeper didn't think they had anything else to do. But I had "Look Innocent," Which I used to counter their angry gazes.

In the end I think we wound up shooting the bible salesmen in the legs so he'd distract the albino shoggoth (keeper's own thing) as we escaped.


Fantastic excellent lateral thinking. Was he a PC or an NPC?

 PC, you see, he was the only one who was unarmed at the time and also the new investigator, the rest of the PCs were already friends.

一名调查员正在打击一些僵尸，他在投出一些坏点数之后之后很纠结。

KP：所以现在僵尸已经完全抓住了你，现在正在把嘴巴靠近你的脖子咬住你。

PL：欧姆...我试着打他。

KP：怎么样？ 你不能移动你的手臂或腿。 你只能向前移动你的上半身。

PL：我这样做

KP：你正在用你的脖子撞击自已的牙齿吗？

PL：是的。

KP：（长长长长长长长长长长长长长长长长的沉默）

之后，我和其他玩家开始嘲笑他的动作，说出“我用我的脸碰膝盖”或者“我用肚子打拳头”。 那天晚上我们玩得很开心

劇透 -   :

An investigator was fighting against some sort of zombie, they were pretty tangled after a couple of bad rolls.

Keeper: So now the zombie has grabbed you completely and now is drawing his mouth closer to your neck in order to bite you.

Player: Uhm... I try to hit him.

Keeper: How? You can't move your arms or legs. You only can move your upper body forwards.

Player: I do that.

Keeper: Sou you are using your neck to hit its teeth?

Player: Yes.

Keeper: (Loooooooooooong pause)

After that, me and the other players started mocking his maneuver saying things like "I hit his knee with my face" or "I hit his fist with my stomach". We had a lot of fun that night.

**EDIT** Spelling check :oops:

我在播放列表中的Trail论坛中提到过，但我认为它在这里也是如此。

两名调查人员正在走出食尸鬼之路，每次都看着隧道的一端，看见食尸鬼的迹象。

dilettante正在使用弓箭，如果需要，她打算点燃，而她把她父亲的大象枪交给记者。 记者没有受过任何关于使用火器的训练。

所以，当一名食尸鬼出现在记者面前时，她开了枪，并且投了一个01（没有枪支技能就意味着会伤害自己或者是在同一个人）。 大象枪在后坐中逃脱了握把，砰的一声冲进了dilettante的后脑，造成了最大的伤害。

最终记者拖着无意识的dilettante在她之后通过隧道的追逐。 并投出了他们带来了几壶煤油的火焰之后，他们终于逃离食尸鬼，几乎死于吸入烟雾。

此外，我们最后一场比赛的Arkham Horror有一名调查员，最终成为幽闭恐怖主义者。

劇透 -   :

I've mentioned this in the Trail forum during the play list, but I figure it works here as well.

Two investigators were making their way out of a ghoul warren, walking back to back as each watched one end of the tunnel for signs of ghouls.

The dilettante was using a bow and arrow that she intended to light on fire if needed, while she had handed her father's elephant gun to the journalist. The journalist who had no training in any sort of fire arms.

So when a ghoul appeared in front of the journalist she fired the gun and rolled a 1 (which, without firearms skill means hurting yourself or a companion in ToC). The elephant gun escaped her grasp in the recoil, slammed into the back of the dilettante's head and did max damage.

The resulting chase through the tunnels ended up with the journalist dragging the unconscious dilettante after her. After setting the warrens on fire with several jugs of kerosene they had brought with them.

They escaped the ghouls and almost died from smoke inhalation.

Also, our last game of Arkham Horror had an investigator who end up as a claustrophobic agoraphobe.

 我最近试着跑种植园，并没有开得很长。 我的调查员包括一个爱狩猎的富有花花公子，一名钢铁工作者，一名医生和一名会在假日工作的Flapper学生。 他们都是白人的 所以当他们开着花花公子的车，同时驾驶失败撞到乔时。虽然管理人乔只有受到1 HP的伤害，但唉，这没关系。 保持与1920年代的性格，他们看了一眼倒在地上的黑人孩子说：“哦，没人受伤。” 然后继续开车。

劇透 -   :

I tried to run The Plantation very recently and did not get very far. My investigators consisted of a rich playboy with a love of hunting, a steel worker, a doctor, and a Flapper student with a Teaching day job. All of them were white. So they were all driving in the playboy's car when they failed their drive roll to avoid hitting Little Joe. Joe managed by with only 1 HP of damage, but alas, this did not matter. Keeping in character with the 1920's they took one look at the black child on the ground and said "Oh, nothing of value was hurt." And then proceeded to drive away.

今晚的跑团：

“我带来了手册，这给我一个加成在来制做炸药吗？”

当你投98时不会。 2人死亡，1人被捕，3人住院。

劇透 -   :

From tonight's game:

"I brought the manual. Does that give me a bonus to rig the dynamite?"

Not when you roll a 98, it doesn't. 2 kills, 1 arrest, 3 hospitalizations.

PC从恐怖猎手的怒火中逃出， PC观察到他们之中的某个不幸的人（一个正在发狂的爆炸物专家）在生物的盘旋中被抓了起来。那个人正以某种方式设法点燃他离合器的TNT束上的保险丝。 当PC赶到一个正在等着他们的司机的车前时，司机询问那个失踪的男子在那。 答复是“他不会加入我们”。 接着从他们头顶上方发生了一个大爆炸，专家的身体部位重重的打在汽车的引擎盖上，死去的他以双眼盯着他的队友。 “让我猜猜，他说要先走一步?"

劇透 -   :

Fleeing down a fire escape from a Hunting Horror the PCs observe one of their unfortunate number (a now-insane explosives expert) scooped up in the creature's coils. The doomed man somehow manages to ignite the fuse on the bundle of TNT he clutches. The PCs rush to a waiting getaway car where the driver inquires about the missing man. The response is "He won't be joining us." Cue an explosion from somewhere overhead followed by body parts raining down on the automobile. From the hood of the car the dead man's bloody head stares accusingly at his comrades. "Let me guess? He gave you a head start?"

几个星期前，在一个家庭酿造的DG会议期间， PC （所有联邦调查局的所有代理人）正在调查一个修女可能是在亚利桑那州凤凰城经营的连环杀手并且崇拜Shub-Niggurath。

总共三名玩家至少有60年的游戏体验，一般来说不是新手.........一般........

玩家同意：特约代理人Michaels和Dunham围绕着房子的后面，看看他们能看到什么。 S / A瓦特在车辆附近停留在前面。
KP：这是一个单层农场主，有一个小的后院，看起来很好。 房子附近有一棵大树，院子里还有两棵小树。

S / A Michaels：如果我们从后面看不到任何东西，我将爬上靠近房子的树，以便更好地看一下。

KP：嗯，房子只有一层，所以你几乎可以看到一切都是

S / A Michaels：嗯，我爬树，你永远都不知道。

KP：好吧，这是一棵厚厚的树干，看起来像一个哭泣的柳树。 你不会有太多的麻烦攀爬它。

S / A Michaels：太好了，我专注于房子，爬上去。 你的意思是看起来像哈利波特的老人杨柳？ 还是在Darkplace开始的令人毛骨悚然的树？

KP：嗯...你看起来很像两个这样的东西...

S / A Michaels：令人毛骨悚然...我通过我的攀爬检查。

KP：当你差不多爬“树”到一半时，它伸出了一条分支般的触手抓住了你，并把你扔在房子里。

S / A Michaels：哦，废话，黑山羊幼仔? 天啊我从来没有看到过...

KP：叹息

劇透 -   :

A few weeks ago during a home-brew DG session the PCs (all FBI agents) were investigating a nun's possible connection to a serial killer operating in Phoenix, AZ and worshiping Shub-Niggurath.

Collectively the three players have at least 60 years gaming experience and are generally not munchkins... generally...

Players agree: Special Agents Michaels and Dunham circle around the back of the house to see what they can see. S/A Watts stays up front near the vehicle.

Keeper: It's a single-level rancher with a small backyard, seemingly well kept. There is one large tree close to the house and two smaller ones further out in the yard.

S/A Michaels: Well if we can't see anything from back here I'm going to climb the tree closest to the house to get a better look.

Keeper: Umm, the house is only one level so you can pretty much see everything as is...

S/A Michaels: Well, I climb the tree anyway, you never know.

Keeper: Ok... It's a thick trunked tree that looks like a Weeping Willow. You won't have much trouble climbing it.

S/A Michaels: Great, I concentrate on the house and climb it. You mean it looks like Old Man Willow from Harry Potter? Or the creepy tree at the beginning of Darkplace?

Keeper: Ummm... ya... it looks a LOT like both of those things...

S/A Michaels: Man that's eerie... I pass my climb check.

Keeper: Well you get about half way up the... "tree", when it grabs you with a branch-like tentacle and tosses you at the house.

S/A Michaels: Oh crap... Dark Young? Man I never saw that coming...

Keeper: Sigh...

来自“闹鬼”的另一个故事：

在房子里过了很多时间， PC正在考虑离开。 他们转身离开地下室，但最后一个PC出门在走近楼梯时受到刀的攻击。 他因为喉咙痛而在死前没能发出尖叫声（他早先从秋天受伤了...想知道是什么原因造成的）。

小组的其他成员开始聚集在身体周围，看看他能否得到帮助。 关于他们发现他死了的时候，有人注意到刀子躺在他旁边的地板上，并将其与伤口连接起来。 随着刀子飞入空中，大部分PC都拿起来，拿出枪支开始射击，忽视了他们已经围着他们死去的朋友聚集在一起，而在短距离内燃起枪支是安全的，如果你没有同伴在附近的话。

大约五分钟后，警方进入地下室，枪口被枪响，响应枪声。 他们发现几个人躺在地上，无意识或死亡，身上有各种枪伤和刀伤。 一个仍然有意识的人站在房间的中心，用绝望地抓住血腥的刀子，就好像他正在摔跤一样。

警查：“把刀放下！”
PC：“我不能 ！”

劇透 -   :

Another tale from "The Haunting:"

After an eventful time in the house, the PCs are thinking about leaving. They turn to leave the basement, but the last PC out is attacked by the knife as he approaches the stairs. He manages a scream before dying from a slashed throat (he was injured from a fall earlier... wonder what caused that?).

The rest of the group rushes back and gathers around the body to see if he can be helped. About the time they discover he's dead, someone notices the knife lying on the floor next to him and connects it with the wound. As the knife flies into the air, most of the PCs back up, pull out guns and start shooting, neglecting to recall that they had gathered in a circle around their dead friend and that blazing away with guns at short range is safer if you don't have colleagues in the line of fire.

About five minutes later, the police enter the basement, guns drawn, responding to the sound of gunfire. They discover several people lying, unconscious or dead, on the floor, with a variety of gunshot and knife wounds. One man, still conscious, stands in the center of the room with a desperate grip on a bloody knife, almost as if he were wrestling with it.

Officer: "Drop the knife!"
PC: "I can't!"

帮助一名PL做出自己的第一个角色时，当这个士兵投出了收入10时，我感到震惊。 接下来的对话随之而来

PC：我有多少！

我：你要怎么向税务人员解释赚这么多钱???你卖的是军用物资还是核武器？

PC：不，但我想要一个坦克。

我：不！ 我很确定美国的坦克没有展示机型，或者在之前有任何的购买方案。

PC：但是我可以买一个坦克。

我：* Wimpers *

后来在比赛中，当同一个PC投掷手榴弹并滚98％

另一个PC：你刚刚投掷什么手榴弹？

我：这是一个闪光弹！ （不能打扰看看规则）闪光弹从墙壁上弹起，并飞向了你的腿之间。 为了休息，你的全部感官同时蒙蔽，你听到尖叫声。 当你恢复你的感觉时，你会看到在自已像个孩子一样躺在地板上哭泣。

劇透 -   :

While helping one player make his first character I was stunned when this solider rolled 10 for the income. The following conversation ensued

PC: How much have I got!

ME: Too much to explain to the tax man for your job, have you been selling the supplies or nuclear arms?

PC: no but I do want a tank.

ME: No! I am pretty sure the American arm dont have ex-display models or try before you buy schemes.

PC: But I can buy a tank.

ME: *Wimpers*

Later on in the game it was going well when the same PC threw a grenade and roll a 98%

Another PC: What grenade did you just throw??

ME: It was a flashbang! (couldnt be bothered to look through rules) The flash bang bounces off the wall and lands between your legs. To rest of party your all blinded and you hear a scream. As you recover your sense you see the solider laying in the fetal postion on the floor crying and holding his vitals.

我会永远记住的两个：
调查员正在森林里，被Mi-Go偷袭。
KP：你被包围的东西！ 你是做什么？
玩家：我拿出炸药，点亮它。
KP：好吗？
玩家：我扔了！
KP：爬过来的东西主要分成三组，你们把它丢在其中那一个？
玩家：不，就在空中。
KP：投运气
玩家：00好还是坏？
KP：你做得很好。

在游戏中。 人物正在树林里的一个Shub-Niggurath邪教组织追捕。 玩家角色中有三个人实际上是活着的植物，在第一次世界大战期间在法国的另一个分支机构里被复活。
KP：好的，你们都被绊住了，村民在熟悉附近的地形，但是在你们开了几枪之后，他们只倒下了一个。其他人还在那里。 更糟糕的是，你认为你在黑暗中瞥见了大量的东西，好像树木本身就是走路。
玩家：我已经完成了！
KP：嗯
玩家：那死掉的三个法国人。这种木头就像杀死他们的木头，是邪教的后代。 他们是黑山羊之子。
KP：做得好，现在你用这些信息怎么办？
玩家：呃...但你现在可以停下来 我已经解决了这个谜。
KP：是的，你已经弄清楚那三个人不是人，但是你要做点什么嘛？你要告诉他们这些了吗？只是因为你知道发生了什么事这点并不会改变的你在一片黑暗中被恐怖的木材与教徒包围这点。。
玩家（坚持）：但是我解决了这个谜。 我赢了。 应该结束了

劇透 -   :

The two I'll always remember:
The investigators are in the woods, being stalked by Mi-Go.
Keeper: You're surrounded by the things! What do you do?
Player: I take out the dynamite and light it.
Keeper: Ok... and then?
Player: I throw it!
Keeper: There are three main groups of the crawling things, do you throw it at one of those?
Player: No, just up in the air.
Keeper: ... roll luck
Player: Is 00 good or bad?
Keeper: You make an excellent catch.

At a con game. The characters are being chased by a Shub-Niggurath cult in the woods. Three of the player characters are actually living mandrake roots, resurrected by another branch of the same cult in France during WWI.
Keeper: Ok, you're all stumbling through the undergrowth. The villagers were hot on your heels, but after you let off a few gunshots, they fell back a bit. They're still out there, though. Worse, you think you glimpsed something big moving in the darkness, as if the trees themselves were... walking.
Player: I've worked it out!
Keeper: huh?
Player: Those three died in France. This wood is like the wood they died in. They're the ones the cult is after. They're mandrakes.
Keeper: Well done, now what do you do with this information?
Player: Uh... but you can stop now. I've solved the mystery.
Keeper: Yes, you've worked out that those three aren't human, but what do you do? Do you tell them this? Just because you know what happened doesn't change the fact that you're surrounded by cultists in a dark and scary wood.
Player (insistant): But I solved the mystery. I win. It should be over now.

 我的一个PL安娜玛丽娅谈到下一步该怎么做 - “我的角色还以为他们可以去印斯茅斯进行调查，在不被鱼人和触手强奸的情况下。”

劇透 -   :

Anna-Maria Yung, a player of mine, talking about what to do next - "My character still thinks that they can go to Innsmouth and investigate without being torn apart and raped by fish people and tentacles."

这个引用真的很棒，所以我以为我会分享我的一个。

我们正在玩守护者手册中的一个场景（黑暗的边缘）。 我是KP

玩家1扮演教授，决定调查阁楼的奇怪的噪音。 当他把头伸过门版的瞬间，怪物就会袭击他，但幸运的是，他的脸颊上只有一点小伤， 另一个玩家决定他也想看看。 我不知道到目前为止，他是否完全错过了刚刚发生的事情，或者他是否想要他的角色死亡。

玩家2：我来看看吧
我：你认真吗 你刚刚看到教授在他的脸颊上有一个令人讨厌的伤口。
玩家2：我要把头伸过门版。
我：你真的想这样做吗？
玩家2：是的

好的。 他把头放在门版上，我为投了攻击，感觉很好，我投出爆击 - 他的头被撕开了。

玩家2：你没有说在阁楼里有一个怪物！

劇透 -   :

This thread is really brilliant, so I thought I'm gonna share one of mine.

We were playing one of the scenarios in the Keeper's Handbook (the one with the monster in the attic). I was the Keeper.

Player 1 plays a Professor who decides to investigate the strange noises from the attic. The thing attacks him the instant he puts his head through the hatch, but gets lucky and only suffers a nasty graze on his cheek. The other player decides he wants to take a look, too. I don't know to this day whether he completely missed what just happened or if he WANTED his character do die.

Player 2: I'm gonna take a look.
Me: Are you serious? You just watched as the professor got quite a nasty wound on his cheek.
Player 2: I'm gonna put my head through the hatch.
Me: Do you really want to do this?
Players 2: Yes.

Alright. He puts his head through the hatch, I roll for attack, he rolls for Dodge since I was feeling generous - he gets his head ripped off.

Player 2: You didn't say there was a monster in the attic!!

我也应该提到我试图跑的最后一个团。那次是由玩家决定援助怪物和教唆杀死NPC。

原来，当我扮演那个他们应该保护的NPC时，我以某种方式复制了他们既知道又不能忍受的某个现实生活中的女人的风格，口音和习惯。( 不要问我怎么样，我从来没有遇到过这个女人)。 然而，当他们高兴地看到那个NPC被喂给神话生物时，我几乎不能继续，而且想给她一点帮助。

劇透 -   :

I should probably also mention the last campaign I tried to run. The campaign that was killed stone dead by the players deciding to aid and abet the monsters.

Turns out, that as I played the NPC they were supposed to protect, I was somehow copying the mannerisms, accent, and habits of a real life woman they both knew and couldn't stand. Don't ask me how, I'd never met the woman in question. Nonetheless, I could hardly continue when they were happy to see her fed to the Mythos, and indeed wanted to give her a little push to help her on her way.

我们已经不得不向新玩家解释日本的绳索束缚和色情家具。(不要问，当时是相关的。 )


电影最终导致剧集的淹没。 15,000吨的水被倾倒在城里，而没有任何警告。(这实际上是在现实生活中发生的)

Gunter在水库，试图通过破坏闸门防止灾难。

Gunter 试图用管道扳手粉碎机制 ：“我以为有一只蟑螂”


 新PC， 布莱克·哈灵顿，私人侦探 - 受聘请了解为什么一个河滨楼主用一个可笑地便宜的价格得到了房子，为什么他不能保留任何租户。 房东忽略提及，以前的住户都是各种怪胎、刀械事故、神秘事件和精神错乱的受害者。

 Lucy Smith：在苏联的俄罗斯，床会去找你。

最终结束了与柯比特的木乃伊的缠斗，通过铲子、莫洛托夫鸡尾酒、疯狂和绝望的摔跤比赛，并重复地刺伤了尸体后。 最终他们将它们拖到街上，置于火中。 这当然给了新PL一个很好的想法，就是如何跑一个致命、困惑、疯狂的COC。 但至少他们买的房子价格比以前的房东要低得多 - 在他们解释了这里关于绑架，谋杀，自杀，疾病，邪教和尸体虐待的历史，对方就不会再投资了。


我们已经到达玩家协会，几乎马上我的妻子和芭芭拉 vdB开始谈论羊毛用品。
芭芭拉vdB ：“我从来没有见过那么大的(羊毛)球(ball，在英文中也指蛋蛋)”
大家 ： *长暂停*
Puridence（露西的PL） ： *开始窃笑 *
我 ： *计数到十* “两分钟，我们在这里暂停两分钟 ...


KP我 ：“你在世界大战时中失去了一只手，当时你的一个愚蠢的下属用正在调整他的背包炸弹，当然下属失去了一半的头，但是他显然没有在使用它。 "

KP我：“但是你不再在爱尔兰了 - 你在世界大战后搬到了美国 - 特别是阿卡姆。
Paddy McGinty(PL)：“哦，上帝”。
Sydney Delthorn(PL)：“这里没有上帝 - 只有Cthulhu”


他们计划埋伏在他们认为被火炬手挥舞着的沼泽地中被猎杀的生物。 他们在后门外听到，一遍又一遍地呻吟着“Poppa，Poppa”

露西意识到这是她的叔叔，在过去40年里被锁在阁楼里并试图慢慢地饿死的生物，直到他们无意中让他出去找吃的，于是把两个人叫了下来。

露西 从楼上来 ：“不要拍，这是我的叔叔！”
其余PL ： *放松，放心，降低武器*
McGinty：格雷戈里？ 进来。
Sydney Delthorn：擦你的脚！
格雷戈里确实进来了 - 一个8尺高的鳞片鱼人，眼睛凸起，三英寸的爪子。
大家 ：AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH


 可理解的错误

任何人都会犯同样的错误-隐居的学者，他从未离开自己的房子的那一天，和他经常靠着正常的方法从疗养院取得人类的血液。你当然以为他是吸血鬼。谁会想到外星人狼人的东西，谁会想到现在有你和你的外星盟友正在地下室作着进一步的法术研究？


Alexei Petrovich ：我要把猎象枪藏在我的口袋里
我（KP ） ：你在隐藏上要取得一次大成功才能掩饰它
Paddy McGinty： *将猎象枪放在裤子里，然后假装是自已的第三条腿*
Lucy Smith：你的口袋里有一只大象枪吗?还是真的很高兴见到我？(见上)


在一次游戏最后，那里的调查员们勇敢地从被溺死的命运中救出两个被绑架的婴儿，但他们没有提到某个事实，如果兰开斯特(PL)没有枪杀了正在划船而手无寸铁的保姆的话，他们就不会掉入海里。


在逃跑期间，随着炼油厂在他们的耳朵周围塌陷，熔融黄金的大桶崩溃，将致命的珍贵熔岩溢出在地板上。 大部分队伍为了安全而没有停下来的时间。

Treasury Agent ：“如果他要死了，他也可以死​​得很棒！”
虽然他在熔化的金水中幸存下来，但他的脚和脚踝被煮熟了：

兰开斯特:“所以，兰开斯特赞美他设法营救了价值4000美元的黄金作为“证据”。他的医药费是8000美元。但为了表彰他的服务，美国政府送给他一套镀金的腿。"
这个场景给了我的一个朋友恶梦。 显然他过去一直在淹死熔融金的恶梦，我又把它们全都搅了起来


在卡拉奇设置自制的Cthulhu Gaslight场景。 我的一个玩家被Spectral Hunter伏击：

查尔斯·爱德华三世：我刚刚被一个看不见的生物攻击！
好牧师：所以它长什么样？

劇透 -   :

Playing a self-penned Cthulhu Gaslight scenario set in Karachi. One of my players gets ambushed by a Spectral Hunter:

Charles Edward III : I've just been attacked by an invisible creature!
The Good Reverend : What did it look like?

McGinty's ：有没有什么办法可以在这里降落？
我 ：嗯，你本来可以停止机器
McGinty's ：我们停止了机器！
我 ：不，你炸了它。安全降落客机和在四万英尺高空上打破了机翼这两点有所不同。

McGinty's： *轻微的 打击 *所以我们本来可以拯救当地人，或最终与大家一起爆炸。
我:相信我 - 那两个都是最好的可能了。

劇透 -   :

McGinty's player : Is there any way we could have come out ahead here?
Me : Well, you could have stopped the machine
McGinty's player : We did stop the machine!
Me : No, you blew it up. There's a difference between safely landing a passenger jet and breaking the wings off at 40,000 feet.

Rondale's player : *slightly irked* So we could either save the locals, or end up with everybody exploded.
Me : Believe me - those were the two best possibilities.

仍然在卡拉奇，好牧师遭受了一个法术的影响，迫使他试图割断自己的喉咙，导致他手里拿着剃刀。
“没关系，我只需要一只手”
<其他玩家无邪的拿出了鬼玩人(Evil Dead)的海报>

劇透 -   :

Still in Karachi, the Good Reverend has suffered the effects of a spell that forced him to try and cut his own throat, resulting in him breaking his own hand to remove the razor.
"It's OK, I only need one hand"
<Other player points wordlessly to Evil Dead poster>

女性PC被黑山羊之子抓住并侵犯：“我要用我的(消音)来对它进行擒抱攻击”
我：“你为什么要这样做？
女PC：“我喜欢触手！”

劇透 -   :

Female PC having been grabbed and violated by a Dark Young: "I attempt a grapple attack"
Me: "Why the hell would you want to do that?"
Female PC: "I love the tentacle!"

兰卡斯特上校的大脑： *扬声器平台的机械声音*为什么。 不能。 动。 我的。 头。
恩格林恩教授 ：你在一个罐子里，我的朋友。
全部 ：* 暂停 *
列兵 Rondale：你说得一点不错，但是—
恩格林恩教授 ：我不认为更好的方法来表达了。
乔牧师 ：他说“我的朋友”。
恩格林恩教授 ：你是一个罐子里的大脑。 顺便说一下，现在是谈谈在古董店的欠债的好时机。
兰卡斯特的大脑 ：我 知 道 我 在 一 个 果 酱 罐 头 里 ？
恩格林恩教授 ：是的，他们舀出你的粘糊糊的大脑 ，把它们放在一个罐子里。 这很幽默

恩格林恩教授 ：我正在移动钻机，显示他的现在身体，直到他能够获得一个良好的视线角度
我KP ：你真的要这么做吗？
乔牧师 ：他是德国人，你期待什么？
恩格林恩教授 ：幸灾乐祸脸
兰卡斯特的大脑 ：你 在 哪 里 拿 我 ? 为 什 么 我 感 觉 不 到 我 的 腿 ?
列兵 Rondale ：别担心，我可以感觉到他们，他们很好。
恩格林恩教授 ：你确定要看到你的身体吗？
兰卡斯特的大脑 ：是 的 。
恩格林恩教授 ：你是否非非非非非非非非常确定你想看到你的身体？
兰卡斯特的大脑：是 的 。
恩格林恩教授 ：你会清除我在你的店里的债务吗？

列兵 Rondale：他失去了10点的SAN值，他还是一个在罐子里的大脑，而且他还是我们中最理智的人物 ？

兰卡斯特的大脑： *显示他的遗骸 - 各种窒息的噪音 *如果...如果我们有。 得到全部 位。 我将会。 好！

恩格林恩教授 ： *找到上校的血腥和快速冻结的头皮和头骨骨骼，并在兰卡斯特的罐子顶部以骄傲的角度呈现他们*
兰卡斯特的大脑：所以我有一个字面上的骷髅头 。
乔牧师：你可能是一个罐子里的大脑，但至少你有一个很酷的发型。

劇透 -   :

Me, GM : *To Lancaster's Brain* All you can see is is these three, moving back and forth. And it's all grey. Perhaps it's moonlight, or you were hit in the head. But you can't turn your head.
Col. Lancaster's Brain : *flat mechanical voice from the speaker rig* Why. Can't. I. Move. My. Head.
Prof. Engeleins : You're in a jar, my friend.
All : *pause*
Pvt. Rondale : You could have said it a little bit nicely, but then again -
Prof. Engeleins : I don't think there's a nice way to say it.
Pastor Joe : And he did say 'my friend'.
Prof. Engeleins : You're a brain in a jar. And by the way now is a good time to talk about my outstanding debt at your antique shop.
Col. Lancaster's Brain : I. Know. I Am In. A Jam. Wait. Jar?
Prof. Engeleins : Yes, they scooped out your gooey gooey bits and put them in a jar. It's quite humorous.

Prof. Engeleins : I'm moving the rig around, without showing him his body, until he can get a good straight-on view of the hole
Me, GM : Are you really doing that?
Pastor Joe OOC : He's German, what do you expect?
Prof. Engeleins : Schadenfreude Posted Image
Col. Lancaster's Brain : Where. Are. You. Taking Me? Why Can't. I. Feel. My. Legs?
Pvt. Rondale : Don't worry, I can feel them, they're fine.
Prof. Engeleins : Are you sure you want to see your body?
Col. Lancaster's Brain : Yes.
Prof. Engeleins : Are you reeeeeaaaally sure you want to see your body?
Col. Lancaster's Brain : Yes.
Prof. Engeleins : Are you going to erase my debt at your shop?

Pvt. Rondale's player : He lost ten points of sanity, he's a brain in a jar... and he's still the most sane of us???

Col. Lancaster's Brain : *Is shown his remains - assorted choking noises* If... If We've. Got All. The Bits. I'll Be. OK!

Prof. Engeleins : *Finds the Colonel's bloody and snap-frozen scalp and skullbones and props them at a jaunty angle on top of Lancaster's jar.*
Col. Lancaster's Brain OOC : So I have a literal skullcap.
Pastor Joe OOC : You're might be a brain in a jar but at least you have a hairstyle

好牧师选择使用召唤一个生物的咒语，但是后来意识到，他不仅不知道他被召唤的是什么，他也不知道如何与它进行交流
及时导致其他PC之一发展鸟类恐惧症

劇透 -   :

The Good Reverend chooses to use a spell that summons a creature, but then realises, he not only doesn't know what it is he's summoned, he also doesn't know how to communicate with it...
And promptly causes one of the other PCs to develop a phobia of birds...

我是初学者KP，但是一个长期的RPG -runner。 终于让我的妻子和朋友和我一起去玩COC的机会，而我认为和某个角色一起去吃饭是一个很简单的方式来介绍这个系列的感觉。

我的PL包括一个神秘的阿卡姆大学的教授（从巴菲思想的吉尔斯（Giles from Buffy）），一个英国的失控者暴徒，一个天才的爵士乐歌手、一个新手的酒鬼，我的性格...一个软的大臣们（看起来像戴维·杜切夫尼）。

 剧透接踵而至…

所以，我的PL在冰箱里找到了装有黑山羊奶的罐子。 他们中的几个人尝试一下，后来在我们身体的一部分（不是太糟糕，实际上是相当有用的）。 不相信这些可怕的突变是由一些奇怪的薄荷绿色奶油样物质的瓶子造成的，我的团队认为是一个计划。

首先，我们所有人都去苏珊的医生办公室，在那里我们质疑他的这些手段，看看他是否对我们身体上开始增长的眼睛有任何的解释。 他没有，但是PL们忽然有了很好的想法，请医生去吃晚饭，喂他黑山羊奶的其余部分！

我无法用言语来描述我对于PL缺乏道德的恐惧，因为我最亲密的朋友和家人冷静地准备了一个由黑山羊奶制成的蛋糕，并且喂给了一个毫无戒心的医生。 效果并不明显，所以医生吃下了越来越多的甜食。

那就发生了。 吃了这么多的男人开始长出眼睛，手和脚。 他的身体扭曲，他的性别啮合和交换的乌七八糟的东西的摧残下。堕落的恐怖折磨他。直到他爆发成一个不可思议的难以理解的怪物。 所有参与的人都在看到它时成功的灵感而发狂，在那里，暴徒们用手枪爆破了房子。

那么问题是，我的PL把一大堆黑山羊奶喂给一位无辜的医生，看看会怎样。 我想我失去了更多的现实SAN值，然后他们的角色开始投骰子。 想想我亲爱的妻子会给一个男人一个由恶臭的黑山羊奶制成的蛋糕。 要么她是一个很好的角色扮演者，要么我应该聘请一个口味测试者

有了这样一个团体，我相信我有更多的故事要遵循！

劇透 -   :

NOTE: Spoilers for Dinner With Susan included!

I'm a beginner Keeper, but a long-time RPG-runner. I've finally gotten my wife and friends to play Call of Cthulhu with me, and I figured running dinner with Susan was a fairly easy way to introduce the feel of the series.

My players consist of a occult-wise Professor at Arkham University (think Giles from Buffy), a british runaway whos worked his way into the mob, a genius Jazz singer who is a neophyte alcoholic, and my character... a soft-spoken hard-hitting minister (who looks like David Duchevney).

Spoilers ensue...

So, my players find the jars of Mother's Milk in the icebox. A couple of us try it out, and later grow eyes on parts of our bodies (not too bad...actually fairly useful). Unconvinced that these horrifying mutations were caused by the jars of strange mint-green cream-like substance, my group considers a plan.

First, all of us go to Susan's doctor's office, where we question him about the perscriptions and see if he has any explaination of the eyes that are beginning to grow on our bodies. He doesn't, but the mobster strikes upon a great idea... invite the doctor over for dinner, and feed him the rest of the Mother's Milk!

I can offer no words to describe the horror at my players lack of morality as my closest friends and family coldly prepared a cake made of Mother's Milk, and fed a large slice to the unsuspecting doctor. The effects were not immediately noticeable, so the doctor ate more and more of the ghastly confection.

Then, it happened. The man of medicine began to sprout eyes... and hands... and feet. He body warped as his gender meshed and swapped under the ravages of the vile concoction. Depraved horrors wracked him until he erupted into a unnamable morass of incomprehensible monstrosity. Everyone involved rolled (and succeeded) sanity at the sight of it, whereapon the mobster splattered it across the house with a burst from his tommygun.

So yes, my players fed a whole can of Mother's Milk to an innocent doctor to see what it would do. I think I lost more sanity IRL then thier characters did from dice rolls. To think my dear wife would feed a man a cake made of malodorous milk. Either she's a great roleplayer, or I should hire a taste tester... :eek:

With a group like this, I'm sure I have more stories to follow!

从最近的“闹鬼” 在被一名调查员被送入波士顿急诊室后，值班医生显然会询问调查人员是如何受伤的。 他们的答案

“被熊袭击”。

医生顿了一下

“在波士顿？”

调查人员一致回答。

“动物园，波士顿动物园”。

劇透 -   :

From a recent run of The Haunting; After getting somewhat roughed up by one W. Corbitt and stumbling into a Boston emergency room, the doctor on duty obviously asked how the investigators got that way. Their answer?

"Bear attack."

At the doctors quizzical look and reply to the tune of;

"In Boston?"

The investigators replied in unison;

"Zoo, Boston Zoo."

我对与熊有关的故事数量感到惊呀。我以为只有我的团员们在用，自从他们在Dunwich的树林碰到了被杀的学生时他们就开始用"是熊干的"的理由，另外，每当一个角色学习到与潜在的神话事物有关的事时他们就会打出"熊出没"的暗号。

发生的事情似乎大概围绕着一个角色，在阿卡姆警察局，他现在被称为侦探弗兰克“幽灵”布雷迪。

在最近的情况下，调查员前往路易斯安那州并阻止伊格的邪教，他们通过使用“指挥蛇”的咒语将看起来一条蛇缠绕在某个角色的前臂上，并向著名的邪教教士说"Snakey先生对你不太满意"，并让蛇点头赞同。

劇透 -   :

I am amazed at the number of bear stories. I thought it was just my group. Ever since an encounter in the woods of Dunwich where a party of MU students were murdered their excuse has always been that "it was bears!" Also, whenever one of the characters learns of something potentially Mythos related they do a ring around with the code of "Bears are afoot!"

So much of what happens seems to revolve around one character, that in the Arkham police he is now known as Detective Frank "Spooky" Brady.

In a recent scenario where the investigators travelled to Louisiana to stop a cult of Yig, they cowed the cultists by using the Command Serpents spell to have a snake wrap around one of the characters forearm and telling the awestruck cultists that "Mister Snakey is not happy with you" and having the snake nod in agreement.

 我一般地描述这防止剧透的情况下有人进入这个游戏。

我们正在玩多人KP，多桌游戏，我们互动和协调我们的活动和场景。 在比赛的高潮期间，我们的PL们被分为5个“邪教/坏家伙”和3个正常的PC 。 在正常PC中，一个人像胎儿似的卷曲在地上哭泣，一个正在切割自己的喉咙，而我则在一边被殴打一边试图召唤阿萨拖斯（事实上，我们是正常人这点应该告诉你这次的事情多糟）

一个来自另一个桌的人冲进我们的房间。 我们描述现在的场景。 两个人殴打一个人，一个人在角落里哭泣，一个人全身都是伤口。 房间里还挂着几个新鲜的人类身体。 那个家伙环顾四周，弯下腰，开始用血液和身体内脏来掩护自己。 然后他开口了“有人有刀吗？"

每个人都看着“邪教领袖”的PC想知道该怎么办，他只是说“他没事"。 并给他一把小刀。 访客抓住它，说“谢谢”，离开。

我们必须等到情节结束后才能听到那张桌子的故事，才能发现这个家伙说我们的故事中有多适合他。

这是最有趣和最有趣的大规模杀人和可想像的混乱场面。 在看到新人在内脏中掩盖自己之后，每个人转向KP的方式和他的平静的说出“他没事”是无价的。 我认为他说这是他的第一场CoC 。 他很快就知道该怎么做了。

劇透 -   :

I am generically describing this to prevent spoilers in case anyone ever runs into this game.

We were playing a multiple keeper, multiple table game where we interacted and coordinated our activities and scenes. During the climax of the game, our party had been split into 5 "cultists/bad guys" PCs and 3 sane PCs. Of the sane people, one was crying in a fetal position, one was in the process of cutting his own throat and I was getting the crap beaten out of me after trying to summon Azathoth ( The fact that we were the sane ones should tell you how bad things had gotten ).

A guy from another table rushes over and into our room. We describe the scene for him. 2 people beating up one guy, one crying in the corner and one slitting his own throat. There are also several freshly disemboweled bodies hanging in the room. The guy looks around, bends down and starts to cover himself with blood and entrails from the bodies. Then he asks "does anyone has a knife?"

Everyone looks at the leader "cultist" PC wondering what to do. He just says "He's OK." and hands him a pocket knife. The visitor grabs it, says "thank you" and leaves.

We had to wait until after the scenario to hear that table's story to find out just how well that guy busting in on us fit in with their story.

It was the funniest and funnest scene of mass murder and mayhem imaginable. The way everyone turned to the leader and his calm tone of voice with the "He's OK" after seeing the new guy cover himself in the entrails was priceless. I think he said it was his first game of CoC also. He caught on pretty quick.

今天早些时候，我和我的朋友一起玩了一个CofC。 我不记得他的角色的名字，所以我只会被标记为内森。 这个游戏并不完全是一个动作电影，但很快就变成了一个CofC最喜欢的动作电影。 而且我意识到这个游戏是为了恐怖，相信我，当我说有恐怖的时候，这个角色注定是一个动作喜剧的明星。 我希望所有那些反D20，因为它似乎太英雄不会看到这是一个完美的例子。 这个例子只有靠运气才能发生

这个投骰完全正常，没有放水，没有作弊。 虽然口才不是普遍存在的，但它本质上是外交与虚张声势的融合。 这是你试图说服某人做一些他们通常不会做的事情。 它是由反对的检查运行，到目前为止，实际工作相当不错。

在被一个盗用了最近被自已谋杀的警察的杀人犯给逮捕后，内森发现自己身陷入困境。 从字面上看。 他被戴上手铐，卡在SUV的后面。 他知道他遇到了麻烦。 当车子经过警察局和附近的树林，他的恐惧加剧。 整个时间内森一直在大喊大叫他需要撒尿，但是男人从来没有眨眼睛。
[清理对话框]
内森：我需要撒尿
绑架者：太糟糕了
内森：我是认真的，如果我们现在不要停下来，我会尿在你的SUV上
绑架者：我猜这是一件好事，这不是我的车

SUV停在一座石桥上，他被迅速带走并被告知站在台阶上。 这个人相信内森是Yog-Sothoth的儿子，注定要带来外神。

在其他邪教徒抵达黑色SUV前。他们几人在这看守。内森考虑跳下去并希望自可以在三十英尺高的坠落中幸存下来。 但是在看到下面的尖锐的岩石之后，他决定这是一个坏主意。

他唯一的选择是战斗。 他知道他的口袋里有一把小折刀，但他的手被反绑在后面。 那么就像神的恶作剧，绑架者问“还有什么要求嘛?怪物？"
成功的口才 -
内森：是的，我真的很想[小便]，但是基于我在过去的一个半小时一直在问你这点​​，所以我不认为你会让我尿尿。
绑架者：你说得对
邪教徒：来吧，你至少可以让他小便，对于一个即将被我们杀死的人他有可能会伤到我们嘛？
绑架者：好吧。

绑架者松开了内森的手，并将它们摆在前面。 内森先后站起来，脱下了他的裤子，紧随其后，也就是说他试图把手放在口袋里抓住刀。 绑架者注意到，只能说出几个字“嘿，你在干-----”，内森转过身来，把手臂环绕在绑架者头上。 然后他跳下去，用手上的手铐锁着了绑架者的脖子，男人的头撞到栏杆上。 突然的动作导致刀从手上滑落到水中，使他手无寸铁。

绑架者幸存下来，从皮套上拔出一把枪，并胡乱开枪。 幸运的是，他的胡乱让这几枪都没有命中。 他的朋友们急忙把两个人拉上来。 这两个人被扔在桥上，在那里，他们开始对内森进行惩罚。 请记住，唯一一个拥有任何武器的人是现在正在载着手铐的男人。 内森用拳头猛击他并把他的枪给打掉了。内森抓住枪，站起来，看着另外两个人跑向SUV。 他他们跳进去试图把他撞倒。 但内森动的很快，所以他们无法做出足够的转弯来撞他，当他们开车试图让内森离开他们的朋友，某个人跳下来，试图拯救绑架者，但这让司机暴露了。内森打开门，拉出没有穿安全带的司机，把他当作人质。 然后开始一连串的审讯和威胁以及逃跑的尝试。跳过中间，内森发现在自已持枪指向了某个手无寸铁的邪教徒时他的(消音)已经在外头吹了很久的风了。

你可能不觉得好笑，但我们在现实生活中笑了起来。我们忍不住想到他们该怎么爬到他们的领导面前告诉他，他们并没有杀死他们的目标，但几乎被铐着手铐的俘虏给宰了，他们活下来的原因是那个人猛烈的踢着他们的屁股。

劇透 -   :

Earlier today I played a solo CofC with my friend. I couldnt remember his character's name so I'll just have labeled as Nathan. This campaign was not entirely meant to be exactly like an action movie but quickly turned into the most comedic action movie that a CofC could be. And I realize that this game was meant for horror and believe me when I say that I had it intended to be horror, but this character was destined to be an action-comedy star. I hope all of those who are anti-D20 because it seems too heroic dont see this as a perfect example. This only could have happened by luck and luck alone

This is how the dice fell, this was not doctored and no punches were pulled. While the speechcraft is not commonly present it is essentially a fusion of diplomacy with bluff. It is where you attempt to convince somebody to do something they normally would not do. It is run off of opposed checks and so far has actually worked pretty well.

After getting arrested by a known murderer assuming the identity of a police officer he recently murdered, Nathan found himself in a bind. Literally. He was handcuffed and stuck in the back of a cruiser. He knew he was in for some trouble. And when he was driven past the police station and into the nearby woods, his fright heightened. The entire time Nathan kept yelling about how he needed to pee, but the man never blinked an eye.
[cleaned up dialog]
Nathan: I need to pee
Kidnapper: Too bad
N: No seriously, if we dont stop now, I'm going to rupture all over your cruiser
Kidnapper: Well I guess it's a good thing this isn't my car

The cruiser stopped at a stone bridge and he was quickly taken out and told to stand on the ledge. The man believed Nathan to be the son of Yog-Sothoth and was destined to release the Old Ones.

This was the time that the other cultists arrived in a black SUV. They preceded to watch the execution. Nathan contemplated jumping off and hoping he could survive the 30 foot fall. But after seeing the pointy rocks below, he decided that was a bad idea.

His only choice he thought was to fight. He knew he had a pocket knife in his front pocket but his cuffs were behind. Then like an act of god the kidnapper asks "Any last requests monster?"
-successful speechcraft-
Nathan: Yeah I'd really like to [pee] but I've been asking you for the past [freaking] hour and a half so I dont think you are going to let me.
Kidnapper: You got that right
Cultist: Come on Artie, you can at least let the man [pee] we are about to kill him anyway what harm could it do?
Kidnapper: Alright fine.

The kidnapper undoes Nathan's cuffs and recuffs them in the front. Nathan precedes to stand up on the ledge and undo his pants, followed by just what he said he would while trying to put his hand in his pocket to grab the knife. The kidnapper notices but can only get out the fragment "hey what are you -----" before Nathan turns around and wraps his arms around the kidnapper's head. He then jumps down catching the chain of the cuffs on the kidnapper's neck, crashing the man's head into the railing. The sudden movement caused the knife to slip from his hand into the water leaving him weaponless.

The kidnapper survives and pulls out a gun from his holster and shoots at the man blindly. Luckily his blind miss chance percentage was enough for him to miss. His friends rush over to pull the two of them up over the ledge. The two are thrown onto the bridge where they begin to duke it out penalties all around for Nathan. Keep in mind that the only one with a weapon of any sorts is the man who is now being grappled by a man in handcuffs. Nathan then slams his fists into the face of the kidnapper knocking him out like a light-bulb. Nathan grabs the gun and stands up as he watches the other two run towards the SUV. They hop inside and attempt to run him over. But Nathan quickly moved so that they wouldnt be able to make a sharp enough turn to hit him so instead they drive to block him off from their friend while one jumped out and tried to save the kidnapper, but this left the driver exposed. He opened the door and pulled out the driver who wasn't wearing a seatbelt and used him as a hostage. Then began a long series of interrogations and threats along with escape attempts. Somewhere in the middle of it all while having his gun pointed at some horrified unarmed men Nathan realized his junk had been exposed the whole time.

It may not be funny to you, but we cracked up laughing in real life at this. We couldn't help but think how they must have felt crawling back to their leader to inform him that they had not killed their target but were almost killed by a captive in handcuffs who fought with his fly open and junk hanging out because he was too busy kicking ass.

Rondale ：我不需要了解我的敌人。 我只需要了解如何杀死他们。
在显然不太可能发生的情况下，只有McGinty有可能杀死McGinty，在其他一切事情都抛给他之后，我们会考虑安排他的葬礼。
KP：如果酒精还没杀死他
Rondale ：我知道 .38可能会让他生气。


COC黑暗时代：

我的PL（总共五个）在一个小村庄寻找一个女巫或异教徒庆祝活动的迹象。 发后最终与Lillith（莉莉丝，亚当的第一任妻子）面对面，而她恰好变成一个超巨大的古革巨人。 我的一个PL（牧师）试图用圣水消灭她，并且被踩成了一片肉酱，另一个PL通过他的锁子甲在吃了一记敲击后被击倒。 两名幸存的PL决定撤退是最好的主意，他们骑着同一条马逃离远方。 我的最后一名PL，扮演骑士，决定不能逃避与邪恶势力的斗争。 即使邪恶的力量目前是一个SIZ 76的古革巨人，并在两轮内有效让两个PL躺平了。

骑士决定争取到底，而另外两名幸存者逃跑。 我100％按照规则进行战斗，而骑士（凭藉其惊人的盾牌和武器技能）与Lillith在一小段时间内真正的在对峙。而在某次她张口去咬他时，在她将自已的头抽回来前，他一击刺了下去，并问是否可以打中她的眼睛让她的命中率下降。我的决定是他成功了，但也激怒了她，她设法把他手中的盾牌给击碎了，而骑士完全无能为力。（这是能一直从4d6点伤害的爪击中拯救他的盾牌），似乎他的死亡即将来临。 在这个时刻，骑士的随从（无意识的PL）醒了过来，并勇敢地袭击了击Lillith大象般的腿。她有10点装甲，所以他的攻击完全是徒劳的，但是她把注意力转移到了他的身上，足够让骑士重新获得盾牌，与拿起一个早先放下的长矛，并骑上剩下的马，然后给Lillith来一记狠的。 她把随从一次又一次的踩在地上，直到他变成一堆肉酱为止。但骑士用枪刺中了她。 利用马的伤害加成，他或许真的能赢。不幸的是Lillith一击把马的腿给打断了，骑士被弹到地上而受伤了，他站起来，勇敢地面对着Lillith。但她接着就把他抓起来然后一口咬了下去；虽然他的盔甲使他不会受到牙齿的伤害，但她开始将他吞进去。接着骑士拿着剑从里面开始砍她的食道，暴击，他从里面切断了她的喉咙，然后一片血液散落在地上。就像海克力士一样。骑士只剩下3点，几乎没有意志，但Lillith已经失血过多而死了，这名PL已经几乎凭借一己之力打败了一个古革巨人。我惊呆了，在场的其他玩家也惊呆了。

另外两名PL此时已经回到村里，告诉大家，他们的朋友被一个可怕的怪物杀死，每个人都需要逃跑，但是骑士从森林里走了出来。 这个令人难以置信的幸运的英雄，弥漫在血液中，几乎不能走路，宣称他胜过了困扰这片土地的亵渎之物。 大家都开始欢呼，其中一个PL走了出来，试图治疗他的伤口。

他投出了100。我判定他意外的加深了伤口，而骑士反而损失了1d3点的HP。

他投出3，骑士的HP降到了0。

杀死了英国的恶魔女王莉莉斯的骑士被一个大失败的急救杀死了。

这是我一生中最好笑的事。我的一个PL威胁如果不取消的话他就要永远退出COC，但基于我并没有在莉莉丝的战斗中放水，所以我现在也不会这么做，骑士死了。

劇透 -   :

From a home-brew Dark Ages game:

My players (five in all) were searching for a witch or signs of pagan celebrations in a small village. The scenario culminated in a face-off with Lillith (the alleged first wife of Adam), who happened to be in the form of an absolutely massive Gug. One of my players (the priest) tried to banish her with Holy Water and got stomped into nothingness, and another player was slashed through his chainmail and knocked unconscious. Two of the surviving players decided that retreating was the best idea, and they fled on the same horse off into the distance. My final player, playing a chivalrous knight, decided he could not run from a fight with the forces of evil. Even though the forces of evil were currently taking the form of a SIZ 76 Gug that had effectively ended two players in two rounds.

The knight decided to fight on to the end, while the other two survivors fled. I 100% played the game by the rules, and the knight (with his astounding shield and weapon skills) had a standoff with Lillith for the better part of a real hour. At one point, she went to bite him, and he got in a swing before she could pull her head back. He rolled an impale, and asked if she could hit her eye so that her chance to hit would go down. I ruled yes. He popped her eye with his long sword and, enraged, she managed to smash his shield from his hand. The knight was utterly defenseless (it was the shield that had been saving him this whole time from her 4d6 damage claw attacks), and it seemed that his death was imminent. At this moment, the knight's squire (the unconscious player) regained his senses and valiantly went struck at Lillith's trunk-like leg. She had 10 armor, so his attack was entirely in vain, but she turned her attention toward him long enough for the knight to regain his shield, secure a lance that had been dropped earlier, mount the only remaining horse, and charge Lillith. She crushed the squire into the earth, killing him once and for all, but the knight struck her with his lance. Utilizing the horse's damage bonus, he was really able to turn the tide of the battle. Unfortunately, Lillith got in a good swing at the horse and cut off it's legs, sending the knight catapulting in to the ground. Wounded, he stood up and bravely faced Lillith, who bent over to chomp him and swallow him whole. His armor deflected the damage from her teeth, but she had him in her mouth and started to swallow him whole. Plummeting down Lillith's gullet, the knight swung his sword... and rolled an impale. He severed her throat from the inside and spilled out onto the ground in a cascade of blood; Hercules style. The knight was down to 3 HP, barely conscious, but Lillith's blood flooded down her form and she was slain. This player had practically single-handedly defeated a Gug. I was astonished. Everyone was astonished.

The other two players had gotten back to the village at this point and were telling everyone that their friends had been slain by a terrible monster and everyone needed to run, but then the knight emerged from the forest. Covered in blood and barely able to walk, the unbelievably fortunate hero declared his victory over the blasphemies that plagued this land. Everyone cheered. One of the players walked up and attempted to attend to one of his wounds.

And he rolled a 100. I ruled that he only made the wounds worse, and that the knight wound instead lose 1d3 hit points.

He rolled a 3. The knight dropped to 0.

The knight who had slain Lillith the Demon Queen of England, was killed by a clumsy attempt at first aid.

It was the funniest thing that I have ever seen in my entire life. One of my players threatened to quit CoC forever if we left that as what actually happened. But I didn't fudge any rolls in the fight with Lillith, so I wasn't gonna fudge rolls now. The knight died.

我们正在运行Finger-Biter场景，这是开始新一轮玩家的最佳方式。

玩家：我要抓住它
我什么？ 你必须与它们的DEX对抗。
玩家：05
我：你已经捕捉到了神秘的鼠兽。 你也可能会永远破坏这个游戏。

在公园玩耍：
玩家（另一个玩家的弟弟）：我说服一个护士和我来一炮。
我：这不是什么好主意。
玩家：在劝说投出了13
我：你的家人最好知道你在这个游戏里干了什么好事。

原始人战役：
玩家（与其他人无关）：嗯，我们救了我的妹妹。 我说服她和我做爱。 成功
我:我猜你们有点喝醉了
玩家2：不，那是早上的事。 我们现在都清醒了 刚刚出现在酒吧，那是船长乱伦(Captain Incest)。

相同的运动：
在玩家2杀死了城里的所有警员后，我们确定他可以拥有这个小镇。

劇透 -   :

We're running the Finger-Biter scenario, and it was the best way to start a fresh round of players;

Player: I'm going to capture it.
Me: What? You have to roll against their dexterity.
Player: -rolls an 05-
Me: Ok, you have captured the mysterious rat-beast. You have probably also broken this campaign forever.

Playing through the Thing in the Park:
Player (the other player's younger brother): I have persuade a nurse to let me bang her silly.
Me: This does not bode well.
Player: -rolls a 13 on the persuasion check-
Me: Your family is the best thing that could have happened to this game.

Playing through an original campaign:
Player (unrelated to the others): Well, we rescued my sister. I persuade her to have sex with me. -rolls 35 out of 40-
Me: I guess you guys are a little drunk.
Player 2: No, that was earlier. We're both totally sober now. Just showed up to the bar, and here goes Captain Incest.

Same Campaign:
After Player 2 killed all of the constables in the town, we determined he may as well own the small town.

威胁告诉兰开斯特的女儿在他父亲身上发生的一切，如果他不同意像一罐豆子一样被锯开，被烧成一堆粉末，并透过变成可能的吸血鬼而重生。(如果有看上面的话就会知道，兰开斯特=兰卡斯特是某个被做成脑罐的PC，然后在某次我没有写到的事件里他疑似与吸血鬼扯上关系了，请不要问我细节谢谢)

McGinty ： *拿起兰开斯特的罐子*这是你父亲的大脑~*抱着他的头像一顶帽子跳舞*这是你父亲的大脑在McGinty手中~

KP:你哥哥呢，艾米呢？
McGinty:我可以把他带回来给你。
艾米:不！ 你不行！
McGinty:甚至不去问他的鬼魂是否快乐？
艾米:没有！！！我只希望他不会徘徊，那是他走到人们死去的地方！
KP:我怀疑他只是想说他可以把你哥哥的鬼魂带回来，不管他是否愿意。
艾米：哦天啊！ *拥抱膝盖和摇晃*
Rondale:McGinty，今天不要违反任何自然秩序好吗？
艾米·威尔斯:但是，McGinty在施放任何法术时都是清醒地反对自然秩序！


Rondale ：疯狂与偏见有什么区别？
KP ：每年约20,000美元


兰卡斯特的大脑通常在长途旅行中占据一个帽盒。

Rondale ：它有一个锁。
兰卡斯特 ：这是美国唯一的帽盒锁。

兰开斯特 ：哦，上帝​​，我叫她把我放在仪表盘上，我将会是历史上第一个摇头娃娃。

艾米 ：让我们结束掉想把兰开斯特的复活这个想法好吗???
KP ：你真的想让他有变成吸血鬼回来的风险，像哈尔一样？
艾米 ：...可能是一个意外....


KP:我仍然不明白，在他做这么多事情后他仍然有办法维持自已在70年代的信用评级，我想它必须是爱尔兰的魅力。 或者每当人们靠近他时，他们会遭受酒精烟雾而受到灾难性的脑损伤。(这里指的应该是McGinty)


其中一名学生对某些标本 - “弗雷德里克”和“异贝尔”号发生了轻微的迷恋，并希望看到她能否养宠物。

KP：嗯，这可能是一个非常糟糕的主意
她:为什么？
KP：你已经看到它们如何繁殖
她:*尖叫，歇斯底里和尸体状态。*哦，是啊....
当时的情况以两名调查员回到家中，试图找到一名逃离遥远的部队的同胞。一个匆匆忙忙，准备烧毁房屋，一个完全失踪，一个人在黑暗中独自一人，不知道他到底在哪里或发生了什么事，他几个星期后才发现，但并没有得到让他满足的知识。


经典的鬼屋

昆西研究生 ：那么为什么你想要找出鬼呢？
教授:我曾经看过色情鬼故事，我想要一个我自己的色情鬼故事。


昆西研究生找到了一种很好的方式来检测鬼和其他超自然的表现 - 用锤子砸砸看。


昆西研究生：我会在书上找到鬼吗？ *有如波浪的锤打*

KP：教授显然疯了，试图刺死昆西。 另一方面，你们都知道昆西是什么样的人，所以他想刺死昆西的心情是完全可以理解的。


当局愿意的话可以发现五起与McGinty有关的纵火案，这还是在他们没有特地找的情况下。


警员赶到汽车问我们正在干什么，当他听到从行李箱里的邪教组织挣扎时。

“那是什么？” 他问。
“ ...浣熊！”，我们回复。
“为什么在后座里有浣熊？”
“因为如果我们让他在前面的话，他就会撕毁装饰物。”

后来，在豪宅的其他地方听到尖叫声：

“那是什么？”
“我确定是哈里森。”
“你确定？”
“嗯，我以前听过哈里森尖叫，我很确定是他。”

劇透 -   :

The constable comes up to the car to ask what we're doing hanging around when he hears thumping from the cultist bound up in the trunk.

"What was that?" he asks.
"A... raccoon!", we reply.
"Why do have a raccoon in the trunk?"
"Because if we let him up here he tears up the upholstery."

Later on, screaming is heard from elsewhere in the mansion:

"What was that?"
"I'm pretty sure it was Harrison."
"Are you sure?"
"Well, I've heard Harrison scream before and I'm pretty sure that's him."

McGinty的收入中有很大部份来自装备和修复很多走私犯用的车辆，结果是越来越多的一堆汽车轮胎堆积在建筑物旁边。 他提出的解决方案是购买arhkam垃圾场。
KP：好的，为什么？
McGinty：私有化之后它会是一棵摇钱树！另外我会安装焚化炉。那将会让我摆脱汽车轮胎和其他东西。
KP：* 捂脸 *我好像看到未来了。
Rondale：是的，你看到了。
KP：你现在有多少种方法来处理尸体？
McGinty：埋进墓地、倒入垃圾场、放在菜园下…
Julius：焚化炉的好处是，如果你扔一些汽车轮胎进去的话就没有人会注意到烤肉的气味了。
KP：如果你真的别无选择，记得你的地下室有石头拱门(这里指的是某个通向不知名异界的门)。
McGinty：是啊！虽然你必须手脚俐落，那样你才可以在怪物出现前把尸体推过去再关上门
KP：我更感兴趣的是有多少东西聚集在遥远的一边，等待着这种定期供应的鲜肉。

劇透 -   :

A significant amount of McGinty’s income comes from equipping and repairing the many vehicles bootleggers use for smuggling booze. One result of this is an increasingly large pile of car tires piling up alongside the building. His proposed solution is to buy the Arhkam Rubbish Tip.

GM : Ok, why?
McGinty : It’ll be a moneymaker. Privatise! Plus I’ll install an incinerator. That’ll get rid of the car tires. And other things.
GM : *facepalm* I should have seen that coming.
Rondale : Yes, yes you should have
GM : How many ways do you have to dispose of inconvenient corpses now?
McGinty : There’s that plot down at the cemetery; the tip; the vegetable garden...
Julius : And the advantage with the incinerator is if you throw in a few car tires no-one will notice the smell of roasting meat.
GM : And if you’re really desperate there’s that stone arch you have in the basement.
McGinty : Yeah! Although you have to be quick with that one. So you can shove the corpse through and close it again before the monsters come out.
Rondale : I can picture the scene – me holding the corpse, you ready to open the Gate – ‘Ok, on the count of three.. no, ON three... one.... two... THREE!’
GM : I’m more interested in how many things are gathering on the far side to take advantage of this regular supply of fresh meat.

Rondale和McGinty声称得到了庇护的波士顿皇家之旅，McGinty在调查有关基金的事情时。研究所所长倒过来协助他并希望他当选州长，并承诺他的全体员工也会投他的票。

KP：为什么要局限于员工？这里也有很多充足的囚犯。会把票投给McGinty的人十个里有九个是疯子。

最后，基于某些可以理解的谨慎，Rondale和McGinty拒绝进入房子，并限制他们第一次探索的理由。这揭示了后面可能会带来的各种各样的人类遗骸，他们决定在这一点上打电话给警察局并让他们先去房子是一个好主意。

KP ：是的，那些波士顿警方真的很爱你，不是吗


 “相信我，我是一名医生”，这句话已经成为我们游戏中的一个运行中的一部分。 它用于几乎每一个成功或非成功的快速交谈。 幸运的是，医生的快速交谈速度最快，或者我们很快就用尽了借口。

劇透 -   :

The "Trust me, I'm a doctor," line has become a bit of a running gag with our games. Its used for pretty much every successful or non-successful fast talk roll. Luckily the doctor has the highest fast talk, or we'd run out of excuses pretty quickly.

托宾教授：“安排身上有明显的刀伤在头上有多难？”

（答：不是很好，一个亲切的NPC已经提供了一个）。

劇透 -   :

Professor Tobin: "How hard would it be to arrange a body with an obvious knife wound in the head?"

(Answer: not very; a kindly NPC had already supplied one).

KP:最重要的技能是【图书馆】，【潜行】和【闪避】主要是用来「预见什么会吃掉你」、「看见什么会吃掉你」、与「理论上避免被吃掉」


一个农民正在田里干活，显然很惊讶地看到他们。任何人都一样，当看到三个全身是泥的外国人，穿着军队的衣服和钢盔，携带各种霰弹枪、手榴弹和机枪，并开始询问你是否知道在自已家底下有一条徘徊着蜘蛛的隧道这件事。。


 Rondale ： *把新发射的武器放在架子上，继续解释为什么在房子里有一个被枪杀的尸体等待当局的到来*


三人试图回忆起他们追着什么而来。他们可以推断出它是大的，非常可怕的，并可能免疫任何他们试图攻击它的东西。这让他们非常不开心，他们决定下一次他们会在海外狩猎不能免疫子弹的怪物。


McGinty：我找到一家酒吧。
Rondale ：我没有把他送到那里，他是自已出现的。 他就像一个天然的酒精检测机器


代理人在纽约打来并对McGinty在英国的表现十分不满。
代理登陆：告诉我，当你参军的时候，某个地方失去了智力是嘛?我见过一些该死的白痴在浪费我的时间，但你.......你........你把他妈的蛋糕砸了，你们之中有人知道了美国和欧洲之间的军事交通捷径这种事有多重要???现在他们密封了另一端的隧道，我也不能把你送回英国去调查，为什么?因为你把你的真实姓名和家里的地址都给了他，而且被以通缉谋杀的罪名*低头啜泣*我甚至不能派别人，因为我没有人力可用。 我刚刚浪费了三个星期，因为新英格兰的一些白痴开始谣言德国人要炸毁水坝来淹没美国。

McGinty：哦，是的，那就是我。

代理登陆：*爆血管*

 Rondale ：现在，如果现在德国人要炸毁水坝来淹没美国就有一个很好的理由了。或者是因为很有趣吧。


Charles Tow Aching ：很高兴在这里见到你，McGinty先生
McGinty：什么？ 你怎么知道我是谁？
Charles Tow Aching ：如果你想低调的话，McGinty先生，你应该避免出现在头版新闻照片上，还一边做着展示肱二头肌的姿势。


其他囚犯自由游荡，其中一个更暴力的男子袭击了调查员。 我的妹妹马上把他的头射在墙上。

迈克尔 ：哦，我的上帝，他受伤了！
我妹 ：我觉得他已经死了
（迈克尔急着执行CPR。）
迈克尔 ：活着！ 活着，好吧！
（其他人不可思议地看着他）
KP ：好吧，你将推力压入他的胸腔，然后把他剩余的脑子喷在墙上。
迈克尔 ：我可以解决这个问题！

劇透 -   :

The other inmates were wandering freely, and one of the more violent men attacked the party. My sister immediately shot him in the head, showering the area with half of the man's cranium.

Michael: Oh my God... he's hurt!
My Sister: I think he's dead.
(Michael rushes to perform CPR.)
Michael: LIVE! LIVE, DARN IT!
(The party watches incredulously.)
Keeper: Alright... the pressure of your thrusts into his ribcage is spraying brain across the walls.
Michael: I can fix that!

McGinty ：我们不需要另外一个司机，已经有我了！
KP ：我可以打破你的双腿，这有帮助吗？


今天晚上的一个美好时刻

调查员发现一名男孩，他们知道在一个墓地下的一个邪教的巢穴里被当地一家人绑架。 他们释放他并告诉他逃跑，直奔家中永远不回头。 不幸的是，他们不知道那些看守公墓的人是一个邪教徒。 这个孩子显然没有回家。

调查员敲响孩子的父母的门，用高兴而用快乐和充满微笑的笑容打算询问他们开心嘛。
母亲：我记得你...（她的脸亮起来）有没有消息，你找到我的男孩？
调查人员慢慢地现了这一点。
调查员(看向KP)：你他妈的！

劇透 -   :

A beautiful moment during a homebrew session tonight...

The investigators had found a boy they knew to have been kidnapped from a local family in a cultist's lair located under a cemetery. They free him and tell him to flee and run straight home and never look back. Unfortunately, and unbeknownst to them the gardener who tends the cemetery is a cultist. Obviously the kid never made it home.

Investigator knocks on the child's parent's door,

happy and full of smiles to ask the kid about the cultists.


Mother: I remember you... (Her face lights up) Is there any news, have you found my boy?
Realisation slowly dawns on the investigator.
Investigator [OOC to GM]: YOU ARSE!

两个PC在我是管家的某个家中阅读一些深奥和令人不安的书时起了争论：

“我担心的是，当你疯了，我可能要杀了你，” 瓦卢瓦说。 “我应付得来; 我不确定你可不可以。“

“如果有任何的杀戮的话，请在外面做，”我说。

劇透 -   :

Two characters are arguing about reading some esoteric and mind-rending book in a home where I'm the butler:

“My concern is that when you go crazy, I may have to kill you,” “M. Valois” said. “I can handle it; I’m not sure about you.”

“If there’s any killing, please do it outside,” I said.

我刚刚和我的家人一起跑了我的第一个场景（The Haunting）。 它很棒，但我们都有点傻

在人物创作过程中：

我爸： ...我刚刚想到一个名字给我的水手(Sailor)。
我们：什么？
我爸：月亮(Moon) 美少女战士水手月亮(Sailor Moon)。

稍后...

我兄弟(扮演一个女性角色）:我会侮辱水手。太过野蛮。
我爸：你可以试试
我：你知道，当时大多数人对于打女人会有严重的保留。我不能说那是很有男子气盖的。

在柯彼特的房子里，经过奇怪的事情开始发生：

我妈：我拿出我的手机，打电话给警察局。

我父亲的第二名调查员Rupert和我妈妈的调查员Suzanne 在质疑Macarios：

Rupert：你能告诉我们这个房子吗？
Vittorio：房子！
Clapper Light(感應燈)：（忽然亮了起来然后把现场的氣氛都破壞掉了）

稍后：

Rupert：他（Corbitt）穿着衣服吗？
Gabriela：没有
Rupert：他有DIO吗
严重的气氛：（沉默）
我爸：好的，我没有说，我没有说。

劇透 -   :

I just ran my first scenario (The Haunting) with my family. It went great, but we're all more than a little silly...

During character creation:

My Dad: ...I just thought of a name for my sailor.
Us: What?
My Dad: Moon. Sailor Moon.

A bit later...

My Brother: (playing a female character) I'll insult the sailor. The brute.
My Dad: You can try.
Me: You know, most people back then would have serious reservations about hitting a woman. I can't say the same about Samuel.

In the Corbitt house, after freaky stuff starts happening:

My Mom: ...I pull out my cell phone and call the cops.

My dad's second investigator, Rupert, and my mom's investigator Suzanne are questioning the Macarios:

Rupert: Can you tell us about the house--
Vittorio: THE HOUSE!
Clapper Light: (turns on and totally kills the mood)

A bit later:

Rupert: Was he (Corbitt) clothed?
Gabriela: N-no.
Rupert: ...did he have a penis?
Serious Atmosphere: (dies)
My Dad: Okay, I didn't say that, I didn't say that.

一个更精神病的PC打算把一个被捕获的并捆绑的疯子带到树林里然后杀死他并处理尸体。 另一个PC是和平主义者，不会发现。 不过他的INT很低，所以他们的其他人都试图想出一个他可以相信的故事。

PL：“我们把他带到北方的一个农场，在那里他可以在阳光下玩耍，追逐蝴蝶和吠叫牛。”

后来他们试图开始一台汽车炸弹（我们在玩DG ）通过警察检查站，

PL： “是的，我有一个身份证的是Majestic-12在后备箱里。”

劇透 -   :

One of the more psychopathic PCs is going to take a captured, tied-up lunatic out to the woods, kill him, and dispose of the body. Another PC is a pacifist and won't hear of it. However, he has a pretty low INT score, so the rest of the group tries to come up with a story he can believe.

Player: "We're taking him to a farm up North, where he can romp and play in the sunshine and chase butterflies and bark at cows."

Later, trying to get pas a police checkpoint with a car bomb (we're playing DG),

Player: "Yes, I do have a Majestic-12 ID...its in the trunk."

我记的某个另人印象深刻的引用是这样的。

五个PC中有四个回到了他们的车上，找到了第五个人被恐怖猎手斩首的尸体 - 他在它离开时因为看到它而发疯了(一边跑着一边尖叫然后被麻美了)，车上那些精神正常的人注到了发生什么事，我描述了他们的朋友和同事（进行SC）的无头血腥尸体。

在RP后，其中一名PC（我觉得他可能在跑的过程中走神了）认真地指出：

“我来看看侦探是否还活着……”

在一段令人震惊的沉默后，，而其余的玩家惊奇地看着他，在另一个PC（扮演医生）说（同时保持严肃的表情）

“专业的来说，我肯定希望他不是.....”

劇透 -   :

One enduring quote I recall is this..

Four of the five PCs return to their car to find the 5th essentially decapitated by a hunting horror - they see enough of the creature before it leaves to drive one of them insane (he runs off screaming - and is recovered). The sane ones close in on the car, noting the destruction and I describe the headless bloody corpse of their friend and colleague (que SAN rolls).

After taking in the scene, one of the players (who I assume switched off during the description) seriously states:
"I'll check to see if the detective is still alive..."

There's a moment of stunned silence whilst the rest of the players look at him in surprise, before another (playing a doctor in fact) says (whilst managing to keep a straight face..)

"Speaking professionally, I sure hope he's not.."

KP：卡尔·斯坦福，穿着一件略带肮脏的橙色长袍。 你注意到他正在走路，不，他是悬浮的，他的整个人都被某种东西包围着。 他看着你，伸出一只手的爪子，并皱起眉头。 你的右臂忽然传来一阵无力，你的手不能再持有或射击你的武器，它落在地板上。 你打算怎么做？

PC：用拳头打他。

劇透 -   :

Keeper: Carl Stanford, wearing a slightly dirty orange robe. You notice that he is walking, no: he's levitating, and his entire person in enveloped in fire. He looks at you, extends his talon of a hand, and your right arm begins to shrivel. You can no longer hold or fire your weapon, and it falls to the floor. What do you do?

Player: I punch him.

一些经典的东西在这个线程。

我记得十多年前，我们有一个非常强大和醉酒的反恐组织，由大约8人组成。

KEEPER：你撤退到悬崖，但发现邪教已经剪了你的绳梯。 他们从你们破坏他们仪式的丛林中涌出来。 你会怎样做？
GEOFF：有人应该把它们从一边抽出来，这样他人就可以通过对方的丛林跑回去...
BLADE：我想射他们...有多少人？
KP：呃...大约80人左右，用矛和石斧装备。
BLADE：那么要射多少次和重新装弹才能杀死80人？
SVEN：Dude ...他们他妈的有80人。
BLADE：好的 如果我们都对他们开火怎么办？
GEOFF：他们已经表明枪支只是激怒他们
SIMON： KP ...我有多少回合脱掉我所有的衣服？
KP ：嗯...两轮。 为什么？
SIMON：我要用我的阴茎吓倒他们，所以其他人可以跑，因为我有SIZ 18。
其他人： ROFL(笑得满地打滚)
KP：Yeeeeeaaah好的。 我想你需要再次阅读关于SIZ的人物创作规则。
SIMON：我有 在这里...我的身体特征/区别标记部分我把“异常大的阴茎”。
KEEPER：（阅读规则）所以你做了....所以你要通过这个计划？
所有人：Hell yeah

*随后，在接下来的混乱中，许多角色都受到了致命性伤害*


关于看到他的DIO是否有进行SC？


不，但是KP对于他的尸体被毁坏的描述非常详细和令人称奇

劇透 -   :

LOL...some classic stuff in this thread.

I remember over a decade ago we had a very robust and drunken RP group for CoC comprising about 8 people.

KEEPER: You retreat to the cliff but find that the cult have cut your rope ladders. They swarm from the jungles enraged at your sabotage of their ritual. What are you going to do?
GEOFF: Someone should draw them off to one side so the others can run back through the jungle on the other side...
BLADE: I want to shoot them...how many are there?
KEEPER: Err...around 80 armed with spears and stone axes.
BLADE: So how many rounds of firing and reloading would that be to kill all 80?
SVEN: Dude...there's f***ing 80 of them.
BLADE: OK. What if we all fire at them?
GEOFF: They already demonstrated that guns simply enrage them...
SIMON: GM...how many rounds for me to take off all of my clothes?
GM: Umm...I'm saying 2 rounds. Why?
SIMON: I'm going to intimidate them with my penis so the others can run for it...I have SIZ 18.
GROUP: ROFL
KEEPER: Yeeeeeaaah ok. I think you need to read the character creation rules again regarding SIZ.
SIMON: I did. Here...on my physical characteristics/distinguishing marks section I put 'exceptionally large penis'.
KEEPER: (reading character sheet) So you did....so are you going through with this plan?
ALL: Hell yeah.

*Subsequently, many characters were fatally wounded during the ensuing pandemonium*

在三角洲绿色，具体来自未来大师的“年龄来临”。 该组织陷入陷阱，涉及在非常拥挤的纽约公共图书馆内召集恐怖猎手。 玩家设法打败它，拉动火灾报警器让人们走出去。 他们等待消防部门到达，联邦调查局特务负责现场。

布兰登（叫ADAM）：“确定没有人还在那里！阻挡那条路！”
消防员NPC ：“先生，发生什么事了？
ADAM：图书馆企图恐怖炸弹。 某种神经气体。
消防员：但先生，那些有关某些龙袭击了这里的报导呢？
ADAM：*静静地盯着那个男人约5分钟*
消防员：.......
ADAM：*凝视*
消防员：我会....我会去做。
ADAM：好人

劇透 -   :

In Delta Green, specifically 'Coming of Age' from Unseen Masters. The group fell into a trap which involved a hunting horror being summoned inside the very crowded New York Public Library. The players manage to defeat it and pull the fire alarm to get people out. They wait for the fire department to arrive, the FBI agent taking charge of the scene.

Brendan (playing ADAM): "Make sure no one was still in there! Block off that road!"
Me as Fireman NPC: "Sir? What happened?"
ADAM: An attempted terrorist bombing in the library. Some sort of nerve gas.
Fireman: But Sir, what about those reports of some sort of dragon attacking?
ADAM: *just silently stares at the man for about 5 minutes*
Fireman: .......
ADAM: *stares*
Fireman: I'll....I'll get right on it.
ADAM: Good man.

这让我想起了

使用来自Crack'd和Crook'd Manse的怪物，在Azathoth的胎动期间玩耍。 怪物正在攻击他们。


玩家1：盐会伤害它吧？

玩家2：这是线索指向的，是的。

玩家1：我要向他撒尿了！

我：你不能这样做

玩家2：他没有通过他的理智检定的，你知道...

劇透 -   :

That reminds me...

Playing a sidestory during Spawn Of Azathoth using the monster from Crack'd and Crook'd Manse. The monster is attacking them.


Player 1: Salt hurts it, right?

Player 2: That's what the clues have been pointing to, yes.

Player 1: I pee on it!

Me: You can't do that!

Player 2: He did fail his Sanity check, you know...

尝试（不成功）快速交谈让我们的方式脱离一个棘手的情况，我们胡诌，Keeper总结回来给我们：怀疑的卫兵：“我明白了，所以，你们打算开一个现在什么都还没有的农场所以才把肥料堆在那里？“

我们：“是的，没错，我们是农民。”

尽管事实上，我们穿着比起任何农民更像暴徒，而且还带了任何农民都不会带的那么多的枪。

劇透 -   :

Trying (unsuccessfully) to Fast Talk our way out of a sticky situation we spin a yarn that the Keeper summarizes back to us thusly: Suspicious Guard:"I see. so, you came here from your respective nothing's to start a farm with that manure pile over there?"

Us:"Yes, that's right. We're farmers."

This despite the fact that we were dressed more like mobsters complete with tommy guns than any farmer who ever lived.

通过玩“枯萎”，我已经改变了一些东西，以适应我们不停变化的Shub-Niggurath之子。 所以，它现在是某种带有异国情调的蜘蛛鱿鱼，有一个油腻的黑色毛皮，跳到调查员的脸上，准备进入他的脑中。

我：它被贴在你的脸上，你可以感觉到它的四肢试图进入你的嘴巴。 你可以尝试把它弄掉。

调查员：我可以用我的霰弹枪射它嘛？

我：呃...可以，但是你很可能会死亡。

调查员：我知道

我：投吧。 如果你失败了就会直接轰在自已脸上，即使成功，你也会受到伤害。

调查员投出04并射爆那玩意，但也对自已造成1d3点伤害。

这仍然是我在RPG中试过的最愚蠢和最酷的事情之一。

劇透 -   :

Ok, not as much what was said as what was done:

Playing through "Fade to Grey" I had changed some stuff to fit a Shub-Niggurath arc in the campaign we're running. So the beasty was now an alienesque spider-squid with a greasy black fur that jumped onto an investigator's face and getting ready to enter his head.

Me: It's stuck on your face and you can feel it's limbs trying to enter your mouth. You can use something like grabble to try and get it off.

Investigator: Can I shoot it off with my shotgun?

Me: Ermn... Yeah. But there's a pretty good chance you're gonna die.

Investigator: I know.

Me: Ok, roll. If you miss you hit yourself straight on, and even with success you're gonna take damage.

Investigator rolls 04 and shoots the thing right off while only loosing 1d3 hp himself.

That's is still one of the dumbest and coolest thing I've tried in an RPG.

我们正在玩Crack'd和Crook'd Manse，其中一名调查人员刚刚射击了一名记者乔 Virilli，他刚刚拿着斧头走进了房子。 当乔在痛苦地哭泣的地面扭动时。 在认出他后，有人说：

玩家：乔，你用斧子走过这个荒芜的豪宅，你想自杀吗？
乔：对不起，我很抱歉。 只是，只是我讨厌这所房子。
玩家：哦
乔：你们在这里干什么？
玩家：呃...嗯，我们也讨厌这个房子。

另外当三个PC去道奇兄弟那里“接受任务”时。 他们说：

玩家一：道奇先生给我们一点时间...(比手势)。
玩家一：看，这个房子可能已经闹鬼了，我们可能会死。
玩家二：你在想什么？
玩家一：我们有三个人，他们看起来又老又慢，我们可以杀死他们，拿钱，回家。
玩家二：哇...这实际上是一个很好的主意。
玩家一：好酷 道奇先生(比手势)。 我们会这样做，但只有先给我们一些定金?
道奇先生：当然是这样的。 如果你答应的话...
玩家二：现在，我拿出我的枪，......投射击。 是啊！ 我射。
玩家一：我拿出我的枪和掩护后面。
我：你们*******现在开玩笑吧

劇透 -   :

We were playing The Crack'd and Crook'd Manse, and one of the investigators had just shot the reporter Joe Virilli, who just walked into the house with an ax, in the arm. When Joe was writhing on the ground crying in pain. After a identifying himself, one said:

Player: Joe, what the **** are you doing walking around this deserted mansion with an ax, are you trying to get yourself killed?
Joe: I'm sorry, look I'm so sorry. It's just, it's just I hate this house.
Player: Oh...
Joe: What are you guys doing with your guns out anyway?
Player: Uhhhh... well um, we hate this house too.

Also when the went to the three Dodge Brothers to "accept the quest." They said this:

Player One: Hold on a minute Mr. Dodge... cubed.
Player One: Look, this house is probably haunted, and we're probably gonna die.
Player Two: What are you thinking?
Player One: Well, there's only three of them, and they look slow, we could kill them, take the money, and go home.
Player Two: Wow... that's actually a really good idea.
Player One: Alright cool. Alright, Mr. Dodge... cubed. We'll do it, but only if you show us the money first.
Mr Dodge: Of course, here it is fellas. Two hundred dollars all for you if you do as...
Player Two: NOW, I take out my gun and...... roll to shoot. Yeah!!! I hit.
Player One: I pull out my gun and take cover behind...
Me: Are you guys ******* kidding me right now...

Bwahahahahahahaha！ 我觉得我几乎失去了膀胱控制！

我的玩家最喜欢的一个是在闹鬼的最后。
PC已经完成了这项工作，第二天去了房东，房地产需要一个干净的健康账单。

库兴先生（房东）：所以我认为你给了这个房子一次好的检查，你有没有发现任何奇怪的传闻或谣言？

April:：先生，我们发现了一些不寻常的东西...........

库欣先生：那是？

April:：嗯...你知道...

Gabe：库欣先生，在你的地下室有一个不死的怪物！

无价。

劇透 -   :

Bwahahahahahahaha! I think I almost lost bladder control!

One of my favourites from my players was at the end of the Haunting.
The PC's had finished the job and the next day went to the landlord who's property needed a clean bill of health.

Mr. Cushing (landlord): So I take it you've given the house a good once over, did you find anything odd in conection with the rumors?

April: Well sir we found something a little out of the ordinary...

Mr. Cushing: And that was?

April: Well...you see...it was kind of...

Gabe: Mr Cushing you had an undead monstrosity in your basement!

Priceless.

这是我最近最喜欢的，我一直在玩绿色三角洲：

PL：好的，我敲了农舍的门。

我:你听到有几个人下楼梯。

PL：我通过窗户看看他们是谁。

我：有六个穿着红色的长袍和携带刀子的人来到门口。

PL：好的，我等他们回答门。

我：他们打开门。 一个穿着长袍里的女人正站在他们身后。 她说：“他是亵渎星星的人之一，抓住他！”

PL：我让他们抓住我。

不用说，游戏在那时就偏离轨道了。幸运的是，其他调台员明智地决定在附近的一个农舍留下来，也没有被捕获。他们看见邪教徒拖着他们的朋友打算用他献祭，最后跟随他们到森林里一个安静的角落。对于他的错误，我让这个调查员被捆绑在架子上，而邪教徒杀了一头猪然后把血倒在他的头上，然后召唤一个黑山羊之子来吃他。其他调查员对黑山羊之子与邪教徒发起了袭击并阻止了他们，一个调查员被黑山羊之子给踩踏过，但愚蠢的调查员被其他人救了。

劇透 -   :

Here's my most recent favorite, from a Delta Green game I have been running:

Player: okay, I knock on the door of the farmhouse.

Me: You hear several people coming down the stairs.

Player: I look through the window to see who they are.

Me: there are a half-dozen people, wearing red robes and carrying knives, coming towards the door.

Player: okay, I wait for them to answer the door.

Me: they open the door. A woman in robes is standing behind them. She says "he is one of the blasphemers who called down the stars upon us. Grab him!"

Player: I let them capture me.

Needless to say, the game went off the rails right there. Fortunately, the other investigators wisely decided to stay cooped up in a nearby farmhouse and weren't also captured. They saw the cultists dragging their friend away to be sacrificed, and ended up following them to a secluded clearing in the forest. For his error, I subjected this investigator to most of a ritual where he was trussed up and left under a scaffold while the cultists sacrificed a pig on the scaffold and then poured all the blood on his head, and then summoned a Dark Young to come eat him. The other investigators unleashed a fussilade on the Dark Young and assembled cultists, causing the Dark Young to charge. One investigator got trampled by the Dark Young, but the foolish investigator was saved by the others.

玩家进入了一个邪恶的牧师的小小地窖，并发现了他带来了一个个壮观的石棺。


玩家1：我们是否需要采取传统的做法，打开棺材然后用木桩刺进他的心脏？
玩家2：我想炸了他。
玩家1：但是，炸了他以后他会不会再站起来?
玩家2：如果我们可以把他给装进瓶子里的话。
玩家3：我可以提供样品罐！
KP：你们听到石棺里有东西在动。
玩家1：我坐在它的上面，把它压紧！
玩家2：我有炸药！
KP：在哪？ （他们没有任何炸药）。
玩家2：呃，我有车 - 把它开进这种来。然后炸了！
玩家1：我会在最后一分钟逃跑！
玩家3：这不会成功的，油箱在后面。
玩家2：我会以高速反转！
玩家3：我准备好我的左轮手枪来射击燃油。


玩家2以高速将汽车倒入坟墓，撞上“非常硬”的石棺（玩家2撞断了几个肋骨），玩家1跳跃出来（获得轻伤 - 他们投出来的)。
玩家3：我要射击油箱！
玩家1＆2：!!!!!
KP：OK，那会引起一个很大的爆炸。
所有在这个小小的墓穴中的玩家都会受到十分严重的烧伤。法老则静静的躺在他的棺材里，等着外头的蠢事结束。
KP:(在投了PL所受到的严重伤害与一些合理的SAN值损失后)，当我火快要烧完时，石棺的盖子突然脱落了下来。
玩家3:我要用我的左轮手枪射击！
KP:你向在油箱里开了几枪？
玩家3：啊。
守护者：法老显然会喜欢烤肉。

劇透 -   :

The players had entered the small crypt of an evil priest, having driven him back to a magnificent sarcophagus.


Player 1: Do we need to take the traditional approach and stake him?
Player 2: I want to blow him up.
Player 1: But, isn't there a risk he'll reform afterwards?
Player 2: Not if we bottle up important parts of him.
Player 3: I can use sample jars from the kit!
Keeper: You hear signs of movement from within the sarcophagus.
Player 1: I sit on top of it to hold it closed!
Player 2: I get explosives!
Keeper: From where? (They don't have any explosives).
Player 2: Erm, I fetch the car - drive it at the sarcofagus. Boom!
Player 1: I'll dive off at the last minute!
Player 3: It simply won't work, the fuel tank's at the back.
Player 2: I'll reverse at high speed instead!
Player 3: I'll ready my revolver to shoot the fuel.


Player 2 reverses the car into the tomb at high speed, crashes into the 'very solid' sarcophagus with a crunch (Player 2 breaks a few ribs in the process) and player 1 leaps clear (Obtaining minor injuries - They roll for all of these).
Player 3: I fire repeatedly at the fuel tank!
Player 1 & 2: !!!!!
Keeper: That'll work. There's a large explosion.
All players receive significant burn injuries in the small confines of the tomb. The Pharoah sits quietly in his sargophagus, awaiting the idiocy outside to pass.
Keeper: (After serious damage rolls and a few sanity ones for good measure) When the fire has burnt down the sarcophagus lid suddenly lifts from within and falls clear.
Player 3: I fire with my revolver!
Keeper: And how many shots did you fire at the fuel tank, exactly?
Player 3: Ah...
Keeper: The Pharaoh apparently likes barbecue food.

[daydayday]

经过适当的调查，我的PL发现他们所在城市的市长实际上是一个狼人。 （是的，他真的是）所以他们有一部分人找到某家个工坊提供它们银子弹，霰弹枪等，他们也试图找到一个珠宝商来制做他们的银刀。 同时，该团的其他PL前往市政厅，并向秘书预约要见市长（是的，他们用他们的真实姓名）。在约好的时间，他们去了市长的办公室，给了他上面提到的所有东西。然后，他们走了出去，留下明显受到了很深的精神创伤的秘书，，回到他们最喜欢的酒吧去庆祝。当警察赶来逮捕他们时，他们很吃惊。（他们留下的线索非常明显）

当PL来到法庭上。其中一人转向法官说：“但是，法官大人，我们必须杀了他，你不知道嘛吗？他是一个狼人！我们拯救了这个城市！"参团的所有人都可以告诉你，他不是在试图搞笑…...

劇透 -   :

After due diligent investigation my players had discovered that the mayor of the city they were in was in fact a werewolf. (Yes, he really was) So they had part of the group find a gunsmith to make them all silver bullets, shotgun shot, etc. They also tried to find a jeweler to to make them silver knives. Meanwhile the rest of the group went down to City Hall and got the secretary to book them an appointment with His Honour. (yes, they used their real names). At the hour of the appointment they went to the mayor's office and unloaded on him with everything they had. They then walked out, past the rather traumatized secretary and returned to their favorite bar for a celebration. They were quite surprised when the police came and arrested them for murder. (The clues they left were very obvious)

The kicker came in court. One of them turned to the Judge and said "But, your honor, we had to kill him, don't you see? He was a werewolf! We saved the city!" As far as any of the rest of us could tell, he wasn't trying to be funny...

上海章， Nyarlathotep的面具 。 船长Phineas Barge，超现实主义画家亨利·杜蒙，以及他们各自的PC同事华尔兹进入新中国武装组织的秘密总部，带着两名鸦片妓女。 他们[错误地]认为，为了拯救世界，他们必须牺牲几个人，但武装分子的领导已经明确表示，他并不冷静。 所以，当他们走进来：

领导者：这些女人是谁？ 这是一个军事行动，不是后街妓女！
PHINEAS：但我们需要他们为仪式！
[其他PC发出了呻吟与捂着脸]
领导：我看看。 为什么你们需要她们来进行仪式？
亨利：仪式要求...○交

没有很好的描绘出来，但玩家可笑的法国口音让我有如被打了一针似的。

劇透 -   :

Shanghai chapter, Masks of Nyarlathotep. Ship's mate Phineas Barge, surrealist painter Henri Dumont, and their assorted PC colleagues waltz into the secret headquarters of the New China militant group with two opium-addled prostitutes. They [wrongly] believe they have to perform a human sacrifice in order to save the world, but the leader of the militants has made it clear that he is not cool with this. So, as they walk in:

LEADER: Who are these women?! This is a military operation, not a backstreet whorehouse!
PHINEAS: But we need them for the ritual!
[the rest of the group groans & facepalms]
LEADER: I... see. And why would they be necessary for your... ritual?
HENRI: The ceremony requires... coitus.

Not as good written out, but with the player's ridiculous French accent I just about busted a stitch.

调查员对诺登斯说“请修好我的大脑。”

诺登斯说“好的”，然后把他的大脑变成了一个夜魇的大脑（他的身体也变成了夜魇的身体来匹配）。

劇透 -   :

So the investigator says to Nodens, "please fix my brain."

Nodens says "sure" and turns his brain into a Nightgaunt brain (and his body into a Nightgaunt body to match!).

守护者：你看到那个从住在城外的老妇人出现在房子外面。
玩家：（作为记者）“我得采访她！”
玩家立即被斩首，因为他盲目地从家里跑出去，试图“采访她”。

劇透 -   :

Keeper: You see the old woman from town standing just outside the house.
Player: (Playing as a reporter) "I gotta get that story!"
Player is immediately decapitated as he blindly charges out of the house trying to "get that story".

调查员听到屋顶上有什么东西在移动，然后有一阵声音从烟囱传来，最后在在隔壁房间发出了剧烈的落地声。调查人员及时赶到，也准备好了枪支，但是某个人的角色却喊了一句话"我相信你是圣诞老人！ "

劇透 -   :

Investigators hear movement on the roof then the sound of something large descending the chimney culminating in a large crash as something lands in the fire place in the next room. Investigators rush in, guns at the ready for most but for one character all he bore was a sentence, "I believe in you Santa!"

调查员们杀死了一个人，但是他们担心他将会像一个僵尸一样复活，并且徘徊在他们身边，所以他们决定在死者身上装跟踪装置。
“它需要一个智能手机与GPS。”
“你在对他开玩笑嘛？”
“我没有对他做手术，但我需要一些润滑油。”

劇透 -   :

They've killed someone, but they're concerned that they'll rise again as a zombie and wander off, so they decide on a tracking device...
“It needs to be a smartphone, with GPS.”
“Are you gonna go Joker on him?!”
“I’m not doing surgery on him … but I’ll need some lube.”

调查员站在一个黑暗的池塘边，在个冒险里这是一个在在中东的森林里的非常可怕的地方，显然是为了杀死他们。

站在游泳池边。

玩家1：好吧，我要进入池塘。
我：你确定吗？
玩家1：是的。 我要搜索它
我：“玩家1很快被吸入黑暗，泥泞的水域。 你试图帮助他，但几乎就像他被拉下来。 他已经消失了。"
玩家2：好的，这一定是某种门。 我也要下去。
我：“玩家2也迅速的被吸入黑暗，泥泞的水域。"

劇透 -   :

Investigators by a dark pool, throughout the entire adventure established as a very scary place, in the middle of a forest that is clearly out to kill them.

Standing by the pool.

Investigator 1: Ok, I'm wading down into the pool.
Me: Are you sure?
Investigator 1: Yes. I'm going to search it.
Me: "Investigator 1" is quickly sucked down into the dark, muddy, waters. You try to help him but it's almost like he is being pulled down. He is gone.
Investigator 2: Ok, this must be some kind of portal. I'm going next!
Me: "Investigator 2" also quickly sucked down into the dark, muddy, waters.

对不起，我是萌新，但我觉得我也需要分享。
我最近跑过闹鬼，这是我们第一次玩CoC 。

PL在地下室，其中一人发现了匕首。他们的当时的心情是有点受惊，一些像是寂静岭的片段搞的他们非常紧张。 在找到柯比特的的匕首后，某个玩家几乎马上就把它放在口袋里。 然后他们开始进一步探索房间，我开始描述它。 我想让匕首从口袋里移动，进攻，所以我开始告诉玩家：
“你突然感觉到你的裤子里有一些东西在骚动。”
然后，我突然意识到这听起来有些不对，在我们开始大笑前，出现了一段尴尬的沉默。

劇透 -   :

Sorry for resurrecting the thread, but I feel I need to share too.
I recently ran the Haunting, it was the first time any of us played CoC.

The players were in the basement, and one of them found the dagger. The mood was somewhat scary at the moment, some silent hill piece was playing and the players very jumpy. The guy who finds Corbitt's dagger puts it in his pocket almost immediately after finding it. Then they start exploring the room further, and I describe it. I want to make the dagger move out from the pocket and attack so I start telling the player:
"You suddenly feel something stir in your trousers."
Then I realize how wrong it sounds and stop at that, an awkward silence falls for a moment before we all start laughing.

今晚的比赛是闹鬼的第5次。 是的，一口气已经跑了5次但他们还没有跑成！ 但是这是充满了伟大的PL间沉默和怀疑的斗争，所以每个人仍然很享受。 无论如何，今天的历史专家史密斯教授说："如果我把一个活生生的恶魔带进大学的话，其他教授在看到我时终究不会觉得我在发疯了。"

劇透 -   :

Tonight's game was session 5 of the Haunting. Yes the one-nighter has gone 5 sessions and they STILL haven't finished it! But it's been full of great player reticence and battles with scepticism so everyone's still enjoying it. Anyways today the Professor of history specialising in occult history says:

"If i bring a real live Demon into the University all the other professors will finally see that i'm not mad!"

 [我刚刚注意到，这个贴子已经经过了十多年！] (这贴子的第一贴是2003年七月一日下午02:06的事，而这贴则是2013年七月十九日下午01:11分)


这是1939年，玩家正在检查一个闹鬼的房子（ 黑暗的边缘）。 在调查期间，他们决定采访亨利·阿米蒂奇（Henry Armitage），因为他们觉得他可能会对他的学生的神秘兄弟会有所了解。 他们成功地吸引了79岁的高级NPC。

PC：“有屋子闹鬼blah blah blah”。
Armitage：“通常我会给你一个蔑视，但十年前，我在邓维奇遇到了一件让我无法不管的事情。"
PC：你不觉得超自然现象有趣吗？
Armitage：“这里是阿卡姆，我不能对每个闹鬼的房子都感兴趣。”

劇透 -   :

It's the year 1939, and players were inspecting a haunted house (the one from Edge of Darkness). During their investigations they decided to interview Henry Armitage, because they felt he may know something about his students' occult brotherhood. They succeeded to get an audience to the 79 years old senior.

PC: "Haunted house blah blah blah."
Armitage: "Normally I would have dealt you with a contempt, but ten years ago I experienced in Dunwich something that makes me to deal you with a disregard.
PC: "You don't find a supernatural phenomenon interesting?
Armitage: "This is Arkham. I can not take interest in every haunted house."

我团的一名PL在一场游戏中发现了一个盒子，每次打开里头都会出现一只小猫。 从那时起他们就避开了所有的陷阱、携带食物的麻烦、也不再无聊了。

劇透 -   :

One of the players in my current group had a game where they found a box that dispensed a kitten every time it was opened. From then on all traps were avoided, no food was carried, and no boredom was ever had.

我正在开一个绿色三角洲，他们住在郊区（所以你可以想像那像木偶戏和阴影戏一样)。某个玩家为自已写了多力多滋(原文Doritos，某种咸味的玉米脆片)的狂热爱好，最后问我可以带几包多力多滋在车上。(如果我问他的话他可能会说超过100包，你知道的，他是狂热者)，我觉得跟这个男的计较他的角色带了几包多力多滋是很蠢的， 我的意思是，精确的计算子弹或手榴弹是一回事，但是多力多滋？

在这一点上我犯了一个可怕的错误，我永远不会像KP那样严谨。

我说“好吧，如果你想要的话，带无限多包都行。”

二十分钟之后，他们记得我说当时来了桑塔纳，冲进了神圣的萨满洞。 他们想将他们无限的多力多滋粉碎成气溶胶态并将其分散在空气中，以取代氧气。或者用数百袋的多力多滋来构建掩体。 或者使用多力多滋来当作伪装，让人怀疑他们的理智。

(中略)

EsturburdüR，多力多滋之旧神。

我知道爱手艺一定会死不瞑目，但他现在在我的书里是很重要的。


让调查员检查一本由人类皮肤制成的书
“我不需要SC，我是医生，我一直都看到这样的事情”。
真的？！

劇透 -   :

Upon examining a page of a book made of human skin
 
"I dont need to take a sanity check, I'm a doctor, I see this sort of thing all the time".
 
REALLY?!

什么，实际的页面是由人体皮肤制成的？那不是太薄而脆弱嘛，质量上比的过羊皮纸？


 只有一页，大概是从一个无辜的处女雕刻而成。


D＆D ：“好吧，那是一头飞龙，看起来可能是一场艰苦的战斗，但是如果我们把它杀死，我会得到11级的经验值。”
CoC ：“OH GOD!!!RUN”


调查员与完全不是邪教徒的人在墓地进行葬礼。

玩家一:"所以Parago和你的关系是?"

教徒:"我们并没有聊在一起。"

玩家二：“这可能是因为他已经死了5年。”

劇透 -   :

Players are interviewing the totally-not-the-cultist-who-is-preforming-rituals-over-graves:
 
Player 1: "So how was your relation to Mr. Parago?"
 
Cultist: "Well, we haven't really talked in a while"
 
Player 2: "That's probably because he's been dead for 5 years."

如果你在某个箱子找到了凯夫拉防弹衣和一个火焰喷射器，请考虑一下自己的幸运....…

劇透 -   :

If you find a chest with a kevlar body armor and a flamethrower, think twice before considering yourself lucky...

玩家1寻找钥匙打开两个上锁的门
玩家2寻找钥匙打开两个上锁的门

玩家1滚动一个07，找到一把钥匙
玩家2滚动一个86，没有发现。

玩家1尝试用钥匙打开门。
玩家2决定撞破门出来。

玩家2滚一个100

KP让玩家2过一个敏捷。

玩家2投出93。

KP让玩家2投个1d6伤害。

玩家2投6。

玩家2体质失败，昏过去了。

KP告诉玩家1，当头回头看向玩家2的时候，你听到两声巨响，当你转身的时候，你看到玩家1躺在地上不省人事，他的额头有着一道流血的伤口与他的一只胳膊处于一个有趣的位置上。

***后来在游戏***

玩家3看到玩家2昏迷。玩家3从鬼屋里取一桶水。他把水倒在他身上时，他开始溶解成泡沫似的肿块。（玩家3的角色已经疯狂的，但玩家并不知道）

玩家3到KP：（开玩笑）所以……我会因为杀死他拿到经验值吗？

KP：等等，我得把经验值在你和门上分摊一下。

劇透 -   :

Player 1 Looks for key to open one of two locked doors

Player 2 Looks for key to open one of two locked doors

 

Player 1 rolls a 07 and finds one key

Player 2 rolls an 86 and finds nothing.

 

Player 1 tries key on one door.

Player 2 decides to break the other door down.

 

Player 2 rolls a 100

 

GM has Player 2 roll dexterity.

 

Player 2 rolls 93.

 

GM rules Player 2 takes 1d6 damage.

 

Player 2 rolls 6.

 

Player 2 fails a CON roll and becomes unconscious.

 

GM to player 1, who was turning his back to player 2: You hear two loud bangs, when you turn around you see Player 1 lying on the floor unconscious, he has a bleeding cut on his forehad and one of his arms is in a funny position.

 

***Later on the game***

 

Player 3 sees player 2 unconscious. Player 3 fetches a bucket of water from the well in the haunted house. While he pours the water on him, he started to dissolve into a bubbly mass. (Player 3's character was insane but the player didn't know it)

 

Player 3 to GM: (Jokingly) So... I get any experience for killing him?

 

GM: Hang on a sec, I have to split the experience between you and the door.

当我看到一个廷达洛斯的猎犬穿过房间里的角落时，我的一个PL哭了起来

“大家快点进厕所”

劇透 -   :

One of my players when seeing a hound of Tindalos coming through the angles in the room cried

"quick everybody get in the toilet"

为我的一个朋友举办一次单独的冒险，而我们团里的其他人都离开了。他正在饱受精神折磨与恐惧，并试图闯入停尸间，希望摧毁身体会结束困扰（剧透：它没有）在验尸官的注意力移开时，他把看到的第一瓶标有“易燃”的瓶子里的东西倒在尸体上，并把瓶子收了起来。

玩家：现在我要投一个【说服】。

KP:为什么？

玩家："哦，我的上帝，这个尸体居然自已烧起来了，这多可怕啊!"

劇透 -   :

Not quite "Fear the power gerbil!", but...
 
Running a solo adventure for one of my friends while the rest of our usual group was away. He is being haunted by a spirit and has bluffed his way into the morgue where the spirit's body is, hoping that destroying the body will end the haunting (spoiler: it didn't). While the coroner's back is turned, he empties the first bottle marked 'flammable' he sees on the body and sets it alight.

Player (OOC): Now I'll roll for Persuasion.

Me: What? Why?

Player (IC): "Oh my God, this corpse has spontaneously combusted! How terrible!"

1920年的团

警官：你能告诉我关于枪战的真相吗？

玩家（说实话但留下重要信息）：我的朋友从酒吧里接我，当我们去帮助路边的一些人时，他们无缘无故地向我们开枪。

官员：好吧，我相信你。没有人会在说谎的时候说自已是有犯罪的。

玩家：犯罪？

警官：这个酒吧的地址在那里(提示:禁酒令)，小姐？

玩家：…Oh Shit！

劇透 -   :

1920's setting

Officer: Can you please tell me the truth about the shootout?
Player(telling the truth but leaving important info out: my friend Picked me up from a bar and when we went to help some people on the side of the road they shot at us unprovoked.
Officer: Well, I believe you. No one would incriminate themselves on purpose while lying.
Player: Incriminate?
Officer: What is the address of this speakeasy that you were at, Miss?
Player:... Oh crap!

调查员们在试图询问一个催眠的人但什么都问不出来，我们进行了以下交流。
玩家A表示"一旦我们问了有趣的问题，布莱恩就会从催眠状态下醒来。 这就像一个强大的不可见的存在阻止我们获得真正有用​​的信息！"
玩家B表示"我猜那就是KP吧"
也许不好笑，但它显示了我的PL的心态。

劇透 -   :

After attempting to interrogate a hypnotised man but getting nowhere we had the following exchange.
Player A As soon as we asked really interesting questions Brian stopped being hypnotized. It was like a powerful unseen presence was stopping us gain really useful info!
Player B Yes its called the Keeper I would guess
Maybe not funny but it shows my players mentality.

在禁酒令的时代中玩家做了几次。

“警官别在意他，他只是喝醉了（不是疯了）”

Doh！

劇透 -   :

Totally did that a couple times during prohibition era games.

 

"Don't mind him officer, he's just drunk (not insane)"

 

Doh !

     真？！？ 我甚至看过PBS纪录片关于禁酒令，我错过了。 在这里，我以为他们正在喝酒，就像是○毒！

    我一直想知道人们如何摆脱所有这些说话的容易。

一个有趣的事实是，你仍然可以为宗教目的而获得葡萄酒。 只要你没有卖它，你没事。


所以这是一场比赛我跑了很久以前，虽然没有具体的使用CoC规则 ，当时我已经知道了Lovecraft。
玩家通过在陌生的酒店房间醒来，开始游戏，并得了短暂的健忘症。 那天晚上，他们慢慢地拼凑在一起，他们目睹了一个未知的邪教徒跟随并谋杀某人...受害者的鬼魂将他们困在这个酒店房间，抵制了一切条件满足后才试图离开。
所以当一个玩家试图打开门并离开时，房间不会让他们离开。 场景当这样的时候：

他们：我打开门，环顾四周。
我：打开门后，然后门忽然关了起来。你只是看见门在你面前。
那么：什么？ 我再次打开门
我：你打开门，它又被关上了。你每一次转动把手并打开它时，感觉它传送或立即出现在关闭位置。
他们：该死！ （笑）我再次打开门！
我：再次关闭
他们:(对其他人），帮我打破这扇门！

劇透 -   :

So this was a game I ran quite a while ago, and while not specifically CoC it would have been had I known about Lovecraft at the time.
The players started the game by waking up in an unfamiliar hotel room with short-term amnesia. Earlier that night, which they slowly pieced together, they had witnessed an unknown cultist follow and murder an aquaitence of theirs. The victim's ghost trapped them in this hotel room, which resisted all attempts to leave until certain conditions were met.
So when one player tried to open the door and leave, the room wouldn't let them. The scene when something like this:

Them: I open the door and look around.
Me: After you open the door, it appears closed again. You just see the door.
Then: What? I open the door again.
Me: You open the door and it's closed again. Each time you turn the knob and open it, it feels like it teleports or instantly appears back in a closed position.
Them: God damn it! (Laughing) I open the door again!
Me: It's closed once more.
Them: (To the others) Guys, help me break down this door!

玩1920年代的COC。

PC1：“你必须在第一次世界大战中看到一些疯狂的东西。”

PC 2：“........为什么你一直这么说？听起来很不吉利。。"

劇透 -   :

Playing a 1920's era game.

PC 1: "You must have seen some crazy stuff in World War One."

PC 2: "...Why do you keep calling it that? It sounds ominous."

我选了1920新罕布什尔州来跑团。向PL们介绍COC，这是我第一次做为KP来跑团。

在第一次的游戏上，他们决定采访宫殿剧院的主人个名叫萤火虫的人，然后谋杀了他的一些演员。而不是采访他。然后他们把拿票去看哈利·胡迪尼在周四的演出。完全忘了本来应该要干嘛。
在最后一次跑团中，发生了这种交流：

守护者（我）：你们看到你所杀的邪教人员失踪了。 一条血迹从他的身体延伸进入了黑暗的工厂内部。
詹姆斯：你说他死了！
守护者：你检查了他的脉搏吗？
詹姆斯：有啊，用砍刀！


乔，德克斯和詹姆斯把剩下的邪教徒带进了工厂。他们一发现尸体就跟着发现了这个生物（第一次遇到这样的存在）。幸运的是他们并没有因为看到它而发疯。在这一点上，这个生物向着还活着的邪教徒扑了过去，立刻杀死了他们。（我用了书中的狼人属性）。

他们都尽可能快地跑出了建筑。当詹姆斯和乔锁上大门时，德克斯放火烧了建筑。然后，他们开车离开该地区，并回报警方，以获得邪领袖被逮捕。

在游戏结束时：

所有人：哇！ 我们抓到了邪教领袖，而德里菲尔德的怪物也已经死亡了。

KP：谁说死了？(笑)

劇透 -   :

I ran a personal campaign set in 1920's New Hampshire. The players were introduced to Call of Cthulhu and it was my first time running it as keeper.

 

In the first session they decided to interview the owner of the Palace Theater a man named Firefly about the murder of some of his actors. Instead of interviewing him they wound up with tickets to go see Harry Houdini that Thursday. Completely forgetting what they were going to ask him about.

 

In the last session this exchange occurred:

Keeper(Me): You see that the cultist you killed is missing. A blood trail leads from where his body laid to inside the dark mill building.
James: You said he was dead!
Keeper: Did you check his pulse?
James: I did, with a machete!

Jo, Dex, and James dragged the remaining cultist with them into the mill building. As soon as they found the body they found the creature(there first encounter with such a being). Lucky for them they did not go insane from the sight of it. At this point the creature pounced on the alive cultist and killed him instantly.(I used the Werewolf statline in the book).

They all proceeded to run out of the building as fast as they could. Dex set fire to the building while James and Jo locked the Mill door. They then drove out of the area and headed back to the police to get the Cult Leader arrested.

At the end of the session:
Everyone: Woot! We got the Cult Leader arrested and the Derryfield Monster is dead.
Keeper: Who said dead? :-P

我的记者向团员说：“我们不能去酒吧，我们现在要去盗墓。”

它在上下文中是完全合理的。

劇透 -   :

My reporter to the rest of the party: "We can't go to a speakeasy, now; we have to go graverobbing."

It was perfectly reasonable in context.

玩《东方快车的恐怖》 ，抵达威尼斯后，调查员们开始寻找与Sedefkar Simulacrum有关的线索：

玩家1： 哪里可以找到？

玩家2： 简单！ 地下室在哪里？ 它总是在地下室！

玩家3： 威尼斯！

劇透 -   :

Playing Horror on the Orient Express, after having arrived in Venice and started to look for clues for the whereabout of the Sedefkar Simulacrum:

 

Player 1: Where can it be found?

Player 2: Easy! Where's the basement? It's always in the basement!

Player 3: In Venice!?

东方快车的恐怖。 两名PL在旅行中前往地下墓穴，看见食尸鬼在黑暗中通过一块骨头在挖掘自己的坟墓。 两名PL都进行了SC。
那是他们与神话生物的第一次交谈。
P1：在地上的那玩意是什么？
P2：他看起来像来自于自电影Nosferatu的角色。
P1：哦，我喜欢那部电影。 他看起来非常真实
P2：他穿着很伟大的戏服啊，一定会给游客带来真正的恐慌的。
P1：原谅我，我的好先生！（与食尸鬼打招呼
食尸鬼：谁？
P1：你是演员吗？
食尸鬼：不
P2：他可能入戏太深了。
P1：我们似乎迷路了 - 你能为我们指出正确的方向吗？
食尸鬼：*指引他们出口的路*
P1：谢谢你，好先生！
食尸鬼*挖*

劇透 -   :

Horror on the orient express. Two of the players go to the catacombs on a tour, and see a Ghoul in the dark dig himself through bone. Both players make their sanity check.

Its their first meeting with a mythos creature.

P1: What on earth is that?

P2: It looks like one of them from the movie Nosferatu.

P1: Oh yea - i loved that movie. He looks so real.

P2: Its a great costume alright - bound to give the tourists a real scare.

P1: Pardon moi, my good sir! (Calling out to the ghoul

Ghoul: Qui?

P1: Are you an actor?

Ghoul: No

P2: He's probably in character.

P1: We seem to be lost - can you point us in the right direction?

Ghoul: *Points them towards the exit*

P1: Thank you my good sir!

Ghoul *Digs on*

考虑到只是试图和它谈谈与“我射它”，我想我肯定会喜欢尝试与它交谈 - 这可以发展到无数多的奇怪的场景去！

我最后一批新的PL（都是女的）当面对一个设计目前没有威胁，并投降后与他们交谈的怪物，只想用铁锤来折磨这个怪物；那些玩家只会从那里得有更多的嗜血欲望....她们:"我要把它绑起来然后杀掉!"我:"你不必杀死他，你可以试着和它互动，这是一种不同的生活方式，你会想怎么做???"她们:"这样的话，我们要拿槌子然后打断它的骨头并杀死它"、"把东西塞进它的嘴里，这样它就不会尖叫了！"

我认为，比起我的故事让他们的角色掉SAN，更多的是玩家的行为导致我需要进行现实SC。

劇透 -   :

Given the choice between just trying to talk to it, and "I shoot it!", I think I definitely prefer trying to talk to it - so many weird scenario-expanding directions that can go in!

 

My last new group of new players (all women), when faced with a monster that was by design non-threatening and willing to talk after surrendering, just wanted to randomly torture the monster by beating it with a claw-hammer; those players would only only got more bloodthirsty from there.... Them:  "I tie it up!"  "Yeah, and kill it!"  Me:  "Well, you don't have to kill it, you're free to interact with it in any way you can think of... it's a different form of life, what would you do?"  Them:  "Well, in that case, we take a hammer, and then break its bones, and kill it!"  "Put something in its mouth, so it can't scream!"  :shock:

 

I think that, more often than not, players' actions have resulted in me needing a sanity check than my stories causing the characters sanity loss....

[碎星骑士]

好多次提到the haunting模组呢。不过这个模组似乎没有翻译过来？

[daydayday]

好多次提到the haunting模组呢。不过这个模组似乎没有翻译过来？

劇透 -   :

就是六板鬼屋(鬧鬼)

[daydayday]

注意：“Vlad Tepes”= 德古拉伯爵。

玩家们发现德古拉伯爵所负责的一间生物医学解决方案公司，其中一人试图大胆走进去做一些侦察。

坐在桌子后的秘书：“Tepes先生现在要见你，先生。"

（她按下一个按钮，他身后的门打开）

玩家1：“好吧，我还是去看看他吧。”然后直接走进去。

他说的并不好笑，但他所做的一切让在场的其他人目瞪口呆的坐在那里。

玩家2-5（出于性格，和七嘴八舌）：你走进了Tepes的巢穴？你怎么了，兄弟？你疯了吗？！

玩家1：“我真的想看看德古拉的办公室是什么样子的。”

（原来它有黑色的泥土覆盖的石墙，唯一的家具是充满泥土的棺木。）

KP（我）：德古拉的声音从黑暗中嘶嘶的传来。

玩家1：我射他。

我仍然不知道他为什么要开枪打德古拉伯爵。他没有银弹之类的东西。加上在不久之前，他们才刚被一个年轻的女吸血鬼袭击过，并且在她的身上开了几十个洞而丝毫没有减慢她的速度。如果你要从吸血鬼电影中学到一件事，那就是子弹是无用的。真令人不解他在想什么。

劇透 -   :

Note: "Vlad Tepes" = Count Dracula of course.

The players had figured out that Count Dracula was in charge of BioMedical Solutions Inc.

and one of them tried to walk boldly in to do some scouting.

Secretary at the front desk: "Mr. Tepes will see you now, sir."
(she pushes a button and the door behind him opens.)

Player 1: "Well okay, I might as well see him." and walks right in.

What he said wasn't that funny but what he DID had everyone else in the playing party sit there with their jaws hanging open, stunned.

Players 2-5 (out of character, and all talking at once): You're walking into Tepes's lair?! What's wrong with you, man?! Are you crazy!

Player 1: "I really want to see what Dracula's office looks like."

(Turns out it has dark slime-covered stone walls and the only furniture is an earth-filled coffin.)

Keeper (me): Dracula's voice hisses from the darkness.

Player 1: I shoot him.

I still have no idea why he tried to shoot Dracula. He didn't have silver bullets or anything. Plus earlier that same evening they'd been attacked by a young female vampire and filled her full of several dozen slugs without slowing her down. If there's one thing you learn from vampire movies, it's that bullets are useless. Very puzzling.

某个特殊的PL:pushes抛下了其他调查员直接跑上了楼。然后他说出以下经典评论：

“我要用散弹枪射击它。”

守门员：嗯，路线上有两个调查员。你发射的是散弹(在近距离下伤害力很高的小钢珠弹)，而不是独头弹(制做成和步枪子弹类似的精准度很高的子弹)。你可能——

“我要用散弹枪射击它。”

好了，对和侦查员1和2进行伤害计算。

调查员1死了。2受重伤，被怪物吞噬。

那个特殊的玩家制造出了特别的冒险。你甚至不需要去计画一个！

劇透 -   :

This particular event took place during a campaign against the Thing That Should Not Be.

Spoilers ahead for those who haven't played this particular campaign.

The investigators made their way into the basement of the house. Sensing
prey, a slimy mass flowed up from inbetween the floorboards and reintegrated itself, drooling and hooting over the idea of consuming some
fresh investigators.

The special player _pushes_ one of the other investigators directly into the mass, and then runs upstairs, knocking the other investigators out of the way. Then he says the following classic comment:

"I'm going to shoot it with my shotgun. "

KEEPER: Umm, there are two investigators in the way. You're firing buckshot, not slugs. You might --

"I'm going to shoot it with my shotgun."

Ok, roll for damage on the mass and Investigators 1 and 2.

Investigator 1 DIED. The other one was critically injured and devoured by the mass.

That particular player makes the adventure. You don't even need to make one up!

在「面具」的埃及部分的，我们来到了地下邪教的藏身处…我们终于来到一个传来了诵经声的门的背后…
KP：你在干什么？
PL：我们敲门…

肯尼亚，疯狂的英国人在坟墓场建造房屋，我们正试图购买房子并一劳永逸地解决这件事…....
PL:我们将会用4000磅和你买...
白痴：我不会卖！
PL:我们会用5000磅....
白痴：我不会卖！！
PL:我们会用8000磅.....
白痴：我不卖了！ ！！砰! （他的猎象枪的射击声传来）
PL:砰！听听看他的声音，然后用.45向他的脸上开火。

劇透 -   :

In the Masks, Egypt part we were in the underground cultist hideout... We finaly stumble upon a door and hear chanting behind it...
Keeper: What are you doing?
Player: We knock on the door...

Kenya, crazy Englishman who built house on the graveyard, we are trying to purchashe the house and settle the metter once and for all...
P. We will ofter you 4000pounds...
Idiot: I am not selling it.
P. We will ofter you 5000pounds...
Idiot: I am not selling it!
P. We will ofter you 8000pounds...
Idiot: I am not selling it!!! Bang! (sound of his elephant gun firing in the air)...
P. Bang! Sound of his .45 discharging in the idiots face...

一个我：“你已经失去了足够的理智，成为一个流着口水的白痴。你能扮演这个角色吗？这家伙很是个很和气的人，只会坐在那里偶尔抱怨职业摔跤是真的。"

我的一个PL扮演了一个愤怒的雇佣兵，他说：“我能疯到能把这个炸弹当棍棒来用嘛？”他有着很低的SAN值，并且后面有一个锲而不舍的深潜者在追他们。我决定让他做，他把炸弹打到深潜者的头上，它爆炸了，他们两都被炸死了，这让他的同伴能成功的带着波纳佩圣典逃跑。

劇透 -   :

One from me: "You've lost enough sanity to become a drooling idiot. Can you act the part?" The guy was amiable enough to sit there and occasionally mutter about pro-wrestling being real.

And one from one of my players, who played an angry mercenary ex-soldier: "Am I insane enough to use this pipe-bomb as a club?" His sanity was pretty low, and there was a rather persistent Deep One following them. I decided to let him do it, he brought the bomb down on the Deep One's head, it blew up, killing both of them and allowing his companions to escape with the Ponape Scripture.

我團中有一個PL非常喜歡槍，我已經明確表示，他遇到的至少一半的生物不會受到彈藥的影響，但他依靠著他的槍支。每次他射擊什麼東西時，他臉上都會出現可怕的微笑，並尖叫著“Come to Blitzcreig!!!”並不停的投著骰子。

他有点讨厌。就在他们离开阿卡姆前他做了一場弹药店之旅。當他們到達波士頓的時候，他不得不再次去彈藥店，而他甚至没有开枪！我认为恐惧是这种奇怪行为背后的原因，因为如果他没有一堆軍火的話他会吓坏的。我一直告诉自己，他有一天会长大的，但我不知道那是什麼時候的事。

劇透 -   :

I have one player in my group who just loves his guns. I have made it clear that at least half the creatures he encounters are uneffected by munitions, yet he clings to his shot gun. There is a horrid smile on his face everytime he gets to shoot something too, and screams "Come on Blitzcreig!!!" every time he roles the dice.
He gets kind of annoying though. Right before they left Arkham he had to make a trip to the ammo store. Right when they got to Boston he had to make another trip to the ammo store, and he didn't even shoot anything! I think fear is behind this strange behavior, because he freaks out if he doesnt have a gun. I keep telling myself he will grow out of it, but I don't know at this point.

雖然是CofC玩家/守門員（第一版是我的角色扮演介紹），但我剛剛到了網站....而不得不閱讀這個主題。

看到其他游戏在人物/玩家的反应上是一样的，真是太好了。下面可能是我最喜欢的（我跑的是現代的綠色三角洲）

人物剛剛遇到了幾個Mi-go，沒有清楚的看到，但足夠失去SAN。當撤退当地餐馆試圖冷静下來和讨论下一步該怎麼做事，他們的隔壁桌上了他們點的龍蝦......

玩家：“哦，我的上帝，這是其中一個牠們的幼體......”，然後跳起來，拔出手槍並將整個9毫米的彈夾打入桌上的那兩盤黃油龍蝦裡。

劇透 -   :

Despite being a looooong time CofC player/keeper (1st edition was my intro to role playing!) I've only just got onto the site....and had to read this thread.

It's so good to see other games are 'the same' in character/ player responses. Below is probably my favourite (from modern pre-Delta green game I ran)

Characters had just had encounter with a couple of Mi-go, not clearly seen, but enough to lose SAN. Retire to local restraunt to calm and discuss next move when the table next to them recieves their order of lobster......

Player: 'Oh my god, it's a baby one of those......' followed by leaping up, drawing pistol and emptying a whole clip from a 9mm baretta into two plates of lobster and butter. (rolled impale too!)

從昨晚的遊戲中的無價之寶。

背景：PC被巴西的克蘇魯邪教徒與一些鱷魚給包圍。 邪教徒有大刀。PC們有一箱相对无用的垃圾。

喬：“箱子裡有什麼？”

我：“恩...一件破毯子，一條生鏽的勺子和一個藍色的溜溜球。

喬：“願上帝憐憫他們腐爛惡臭的邪教靈魂。”

劇透 -   :

A priceless line from last night's game.

BACKGROUND: The PCs are surrounded by Brazilian Cthulhu Cultists, who have a number of leashed alligators/crocodiles among them. The Cultists have machetes. The PCs have a crate of relatively useless junk.

Joe: "What's in the crate?"

Me: "Uhm...a torn blanket, a couple rusty spoons and a blue Yo-Yo."

Joe: "May God have mercy on their rotten, stinking Cultist souls."

我们在角色塑造上经历了一段艰难的时期，因为那时我们还没有确定一个什麼時候開團。我们必须在數個混亂的時間中確定我們的創作，所以当我们终于能够开始的时候，我们並没有意識到自已做了什麼。

戴夫（化名，見上面攜帶了假DIO的玩家那個項目）选择扮演一个堕落的法国艺术家，即使他像劇本一樣寫了一堆人物會說的話，他设法保持性格。（我们一致决定不给他任何道具。）

其他玩家是一个無情的记者，一名抱持著全面的懷疑論的心理史學教授，一位喜歡在業餘時間殺人的聖經推銷員。我期待着有机会让这个团队一起跑團，并在不久的将来继续下去。

劇透 -   :

We had a tough time with character creation because we hadn't settled on a venue at that point. We had to spread creation over several sessions wherever we could find space and time, so when we were finally able to start, we weren't in the mood to be serious.

Dave (not his real name) chose to play a depraved french artist, and even while he was hamming it up like the transcript shows, he managed to stay in character. (We unanimously decided not to allow him any props.)

The other characters were a hardboiled reporter, a psychic history professor who was a total sceptic and a bible salesman who liked to kill people in his spare time. I'm looking forward to a chance to put the group back together and continue in the near future.

昨晚的遊戲，玩家（與“無意中的大規模殺戮”主題相同）坐著出租車跟踪著歹徒找到了他的藏身處。 他們跟了一個街區，並開始策略如何潛行並和竊聽。 那個凶狠且興奮的出租車司機突然想要和玩家們一起“冒險”。

PC討論了一下，並決定如果發生了可怕的錯誤的話他們該使用多大的火力來解決。

“好吧，”一個PC說，“你可以來，但別做任何蠢事，除非…除非…除非我们先做！”

劇透 -   :

Last night's game. Players (same ones from the "inadvertant mass manslaughter" topic) are tailing gangsters to their hideout in a taxi. They stop a block away and start strategizing about how to best to sneak up and eavesdrop. The punchy, excitable taxi driver wants to come along on the "adventure."

PCs discuss, and decide they could use the firepower if all goes horribly wrong.

"Okay," says a PC, "you can come. But don't do anything stupid! Unless ... unless ... unless we do it first!"

几年前，我们的KP，進行一場非常奇怪的COC /泛用无界角色扮演系统的游戏，决定跑「黑暗之心」，但它改在现代。在探险结束时，我们被邀请参加两个对手的晚餐（我真的不记得他们是谁，除了参与狼人情节的一部分）。在这一点上，我團的人没有理由不希望这两人死亡，因为我们已经知道他们是邪教组织做坏事的一部分。

我：（坐在餐厅的桌子上），给我一个不杀你的理由。

KP（扮演邪教徒）：哦，我們只是因為社會原因加入了邪教。

我：哦，对，就像我加入了大卫教派的野餐。

KP看上去像一头被灯光照到的鹿，房间里沉默了大约10秒钟，其他的人突然爆笑起来。对于那些不明白的發生什麼事的人，大卫教派是一個在美國韦科的教會，並在他們的院子裡放火。

劇透 -   :

A few years back our Keeper, who was running a very odd CoC/GURPS game, decided to run Heart of Darkness, but set it in modern day. At the end of the adventure, we were invited to a dinner by the two antagonists (I honestly can't remember who they were, other than part of the family involved in the plot of werewolves). At this point, our party had no reason not to want these two dead, as we already knew they were part of the cult doing very bad things.

Me: [sitting at the restaurant table] So give me a reason not to kill you.

Keeper (as the cultists): Oh, we only joined that cult for social reasons.

Me: Oh, right, just like I joined the Branch Davidians for the cookouts.

The Keeper looked like a deer caught in headlights, and the room went silent for about 10 seconds before the other players burst out laughing. For those who don't get it, the Branch Davidians were the cult in Waco, TX who set fire to their own compound.

[碎星骑士]

好多次提到the haunting模组呢。不过这个模组似乎没有翻译过来？

劇透 -   :

就是六板鬼屋(鬧鬼)

劇透 -   :

好吧，貌似我把赌局和鬼屋有点弄混..

[daydayday]

好多次提到the haunting模组呢。不过这个模组似乎没有翻译过来？

劇透 -   :

就是六板鬼屋(鬧鬼)

劇透 -   :

好吧，貌似我把赌局和鬼屋有点弄混..

劇透 -   :

赌局我印象中是the bit(来打賭吧)

[碎星骑士]

劇透 -   :

the bet

[街猫口喵]

Rupert：你能告诉我们这个房子吗？
Vittorio：房子！
Clapper Light：（打开和完全杀死的心情）

（这其实是个感应灯的梗...因为PC喊的声音大了一点，灯就亮了起来，并且毁掉了气氛）

[世纪末养鸡场主]

LZ辛苦了，请问可以把这些搬运到NGA吗？出处和作者都会好好标明的